My Junior year of college is here, and I am still trying to figure out how it came so fast. I am halfway done with this college experience and I am trying to gather all of my thoughts and emotions.

I keep looking back on my Freshman year and I am comparing it to where I am now. Of course, so many things have changed. I have learned so much about myself and I have found an overwhelming amount of independence.

However, I still feel like there are a few things that have not changed at all. There are moments where I still feel like that Freshman girl. Scared and wondering how I will ever make decisions on my own.

Sometimes I wonder how on earth I have made it this far, and how am I going to handle all that is yet to come.

I wrote this poem, to sum up, all of the words that have been racing through my mind about this coming year. It embodies this idea that we push certain things ahead over and over and then suddenly, two years have passed. No matter how comfortable we get, life keeps bringing new things that can be exciting and overwhelming at the same time.

Are you supposed to stop being scared?

when do the confidence and certainty appear?

I guess it will come with another year

Feeling like an infant

learning all things new

Even when it seems like there is nothing new anymore

I have learned everything I am supposed to know

I have seen all I am supposed to see

But sometimes the newness comes in waves

I am struck

I am speechless

My hands are not strong enough to hold it all

Does everyone feel this way?

Finding the balance between excitement and fear

that picture never seems to be clear

maybe it will appear in another year