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Pick-up Lines Guarenteed To NEVER Get You The Girl

27. If I were a squirrel and you were a tree, I'd store my nuts in your hole.

Gabrielle Picone

Mar 15, 2017

Kean University

Pick-up Lines Guarenteed To NEVER Get You The Girl

1. Hey girl, did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is busted.

2. Know what's on the Menu? Me-n-u.

3. You look like I need a drink.

4. You can come back to my place and we can play house. You can be the door, and I'll slam ya.

5. There's a big sale in my bedroom... clothes are 100% off.

6. That's a nice dress, it would look better at the foot of my bed.

7. I'll be Burger King and you'll be McDonalds... I'll have it my way and you'll be loving it.

8. Do I know you? Because you look a lot like my next girlfriend.

9. Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I can really see myself in them.

10. Are you a parking ticket? Because you've got FINE written all over you.

11. Wanna be my girlfrien? I didn't put the D because you'll get that later.

12. I wish you were my pinky toe so I could bang you on all the furniture in my house.

13. I think you're suffering from a lack of vitamin me.

14. Hey girl, are you a pokemon? Because I really wanna throw my balls at you.

15. You should sell hotdogs because you already know how to make a wiener stand.

16. Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.

17. So, uh, we gunna be more than cousins?

18. You're so hot, that even on a cold winter night, my penis would stand for you.

19. Nice legs.. what time do they open?

20. Girl if you were a booger I'd pick you first.

21. Girl, if you were a fart, I would hold you in because I know you're the shit.

22. Were you born on a farm? Because you know how to raise a cock.

23. One night with me and they'll be calling you moaning myrtle.

24. If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

25. Are your legs made of Nutella, cause I'd like to spread them.

26. Was your dad a baker? Because you've got a nice set of buns.

27. If I were a squirrel and you were a tree, I'd store my nuts in your hole.

28. We're like Little Ceaser's, we're hot and ready.

29. I'd look good in you.

30. The only thing that should stand between our love is latex.

31. If I were you, I'd do me.

32. Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?

33. Your place or mine?

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Pick-up Lines Guarenteed To NEVER Get You The Girl

27. If I were a squirrel and you were a tree, I'd store my nuts in your hole.

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

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