I don't know what has gotten into me lately. I am literally obsessed with the idea of Peter Pan. It mostly is because a new version of Peter Pan is coming out soon titled, "Pan." The commercial alone made me cry the first time I saw it. And if you haven't seen it yet, now you will, because I've attached it below so you can have the same feels.

As I start to hyperventilate thinking about what I'm going to do when I graduate from college, I have begun to look back more and more to my childhood, back to a time where imagination was key and there were no worries past what dinner was going to be. I didn't have to worry about whether or not Prince Charming was going to come knocking, and I definitely didn't have to worry about finishing my thesis by the end of the fall. I just knew that everything would work out.

Suffice to say I don't want to grow up, and I am here to argue that this is not a horrible goal. One of my favorite Walt Disney quotes is, "You're dead if you aim only for kids. Adults are only kids grown up, anyway." I am a firm believer of this statement and have proven it true many, many times. I celebrated my twentieth birthday at Walt Disney World and plan to do the same for my twenty-first. There is no shame in knowing what you want, which is pretty much what I'm getting at. I'm not thinking about the "unrealistic" ideas that Disney has given me about what I should want in a partner, or the rosy outlook that goes along with these movies. The bad guy isn't always going to lose out here in the real world, no matter how much I wish it were true. Not everyone lives happily ever after with their soul mate. Tragedies happen.

But I want Disney when I think about what I'm doing with my life. I don't want to only worry about money and mortgages and food. I know that's going to happen whether I'm prepared for it or not. What I'm getting at is that I don't want to feel as if I'm stuck in some never ending cycle. When I go to work, I don't want to do it just for the paycheck. I don't always want to watch the clock for the end of the day. That would literally be no fun. I've had classes like that and I have no need for that feeling to be there constantly during a 9 to 5 job. That would be 40 hours every week that I would just be waiting to be over. So, instead, I choose not to grow up. I choose to know what I want and to go after it.

I'm not crazy, I promise (Well, maybe a little, but that's my charm). But what I've realized is that when you ask a kid what they want to do when they grow up, they are completely certain what they want to be. When you ask an adult what they want to do, it is not the same. Because, by then, they are grown-ups, and grown-ups have other things to worry about than what they really would want to be doing with their lives. That wouldn't be idealistic. I want to do something I love right from the start, so that I do not have to look back on my life and regret that I did not pursue my dreams. Whether that's doing odd jobs to support my writing, or working my way up the ranks at a publishing branch, I just want to be happy.

To be happy is not a lofty goal to some. That is something that everyone should be, right? But if you were to ask yourself right now if you are completely happy with the way your life is right now, what would you say? Could you at least be happy with the way you lead your life? I don't want to have to ask these questions, and I definitely don't want to have to think about the answers. I want to always be certain about my life, certain that I am happy with the way I lead it. And I don't believe that I need to grow up to learn how to do that. I think kids already have that part right. So, why work on something that doesn't need to be fixed? That's where problems usually arise anyways. I'm going to hold on to that certainty that life is going to work out and be wonderful. That's when life becomes an adventure, even if I still am growing up.

Peter Pan might not be here anymore to take me to Neverland, but I can certainly make my own life a little like Neverland. All I need is faith, trust, and a little bit of pixie dust.