Let’s be real -- if you’re a girl and live in 2016, chances are you want to be a mermaid. We all do. I mean, I do. What else could you want? You live physically in and on the beach. Sign me up! Sometimes I wish I could drop everything, all of my responsibilities, and become a mermaid. What perks would you have as a mermaid? Let’s see…

1. Your hair is bouncy and fresh at all times. The water and salty air don't make it look frizzy. In fact, you have beachy hair that is perfect at all times. Can I have that please?
2. You don’t need a bath to relax. You literally live in a huge bathtub -- the ocean. What more could you want?
3. A free clam shell bra. All different colors, styles and textures. No need for Victoria’s Secret and their new seasonal products.
4. You can travel the world for free! You can swim there, duh… next stop, Hawaii, Fiji, Greece. Oh, the places you'll go!
5. You don’t have to wear pants. I’ll stop at that. No pants, people. Free at last!
6. You can “hair flip” and look gorgeous. You all know what I mean. No water splattered in your face. You literally live in the water. You have this flirty tactic down pat by now!
7. You can always spend time with your BFFs! After all, little Nemo may live in the coral next door. Swim on by when you’d like, dear friend.
8. You can breathe underwater without having to gasp for air every 30 seconds because your lungs feel like they are going to explode. Deep breathing is not a worry a mermaid has under the sea!
9. Your weekend activities could include exploring shipwrecks and diving for gems! How awesome would that be?

OK, so maybe being a mermaid sounds weird to you. Maybe it sounds cool. Regardless of your opinion on mermaids, there is no real way to become one. That is, unless you work as a professional mermaid in an underwater show.