I believe everyone comes into our lives for a reason. I'm not saying I believe that it was fate we met certain people, but I'm not knocking the idea that maybe it was meant to be either. All I know, as a human being who has experienced the tremendous loss of people from their own life for various reasons and who has also had the pleasure of experiencing new things with new people, I know that people have crossed my path and it can't just be a coincidence.
My family is a big part of my life, I love them in every way possible. There's a whole other side of my family that I haven't even met in Poland. Is there a part of the universe that keeps me from meeting them because it's a good thing or is it I just haven't had the chance? I know that the people I have in my life right now have made me the person I am today. I'm grateful to be raised by a loving family who has nurtured me and taught me everything I know. I have been blessed to have a father who has taught me the value of hard work and honesty and a mother who has shown me how to be compassionate and empathetic. My siblings have taught me to stand up for what I believe in and also how to fake cry to get myself out of trouble, but that's a ploy I could only use as a kid.
Although my family has shaped me into the best human I could possibly be, it was up to me to decide how I needed to shape myself. It was up to me to choose to hang with the group of girls who started getting into drugs or to choose the friends that make me laugh until abs formed under my shirt. I could choose to go to the basketball game because all of my friends were going or I could stay home and study for the test I know I needed to pass to get an A in the class. It was up to me to decide if I wanted to step through the door of the first party I've ever gone to or to walk away from the house.
When I look back on all the decisions I've made and who I've made them with, it made me realize that those people that guided me through all my first experiences were meant to be there. I needed people to help me get over my fears and to grow with me so I knew someone would be there by my side. Sadly, not everyone stays. Not everyone you needed will stay by your side. They will follow the direction of the wind and before you can even grab them, they've disappeared. They will choose to leave you without a blink of an eye and now it's up to you to get through those fears without them. It's possible, I've done it.
You learn to out-grow people before you even realize it because you know it's time for you to move on to the next phase of your life, the next experience, or the next goal. Yes, they helped you chug that last beer and they helped you decide what outfit to wear on your date with a cute guy at Starbucks, but if they decide to leave then let them. If they choose to leave, they don't deserve your effort, your love, and don't realize your worth. It's okay. Not everyone you cross paths with is meant to stay in your life and yes you may wish the best for them, but you need to worry about yourself. As life goes on, more and more people will come across you and even though you wish they would make the decision to stay and grow with you, they move on. Accept that.
Do I believe that even the people that hurt you were meant to be in your life? Yes, I do. Your exes have taught you love, but have also taught you heartbreak. The best friend that lived down the street taught you how to play with barbies and how to properly twerk but also taught you what it's like to be betrayed and what your own worth is. The cousin who you grew up with that said she wanted to be just like you taught you how admiration as a child turns into nasty, jealousy as an adult because you're more successful. The bullies that pretended to be your friends at first because you were the new kid then made fun of you to the point that you would come home crying every day after school taught you what it was like to be lied to and publicly humiliated because you weren't thin enough, but also showed you how to self-love. These people may have shown the cruel side of humanity, but they have each dropped an experience into your life that you have grown from and has shaped you into the being you are today.
Will I reconnect with any of the people from my past that have gone with the wind? Who knows. If I do, will that make me feel like I'm taking a step back? It might and if it does then that relationship was not meant to be in my life. The people I have let into my life have given me memories, great memories, that I'll never forget. In the end, people come into your life for a reason whether it's to help you grow or to teach you a lesson and what you do with those experiences is your choice.