For People Who Have Bangs

For People Who Have Bangs

"Should I get bangs?"
2012
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Every girl has asked herself once or twice, "should I get bangs?" But for people who really do have bangs, it's never been a question. Bangs are a part of who you are; they have been around as long as you can remember, and going without your bangs is like walking around basically naked. There are some things only people with bangs can understand, like having random strangers approach you to just to make comments on your hairstyle.

1. It feels as if you were born with bangs.

There isn't a distinct moment you remember getting bangs. It feels as if just one day, you had them and you never went back.

2. Hearing people's opinions about your hair (whether you asked or not).

Strangers will approach me to make comments on my bangs. The amount of times people have said to me, "I hate bangs but you pull them off!" is countless. People will offer me suggestions for my bangs whether I said I was looking for a new style or not.

3. Hair days rely solely on your bangs.

If your bangs won't cooperate, it doesn't really matter what the rest of your hair even looks like. Nothing is more frustrating than not being able to get your bangs to do what you want them to.

4. Being told you look like someone just because of your bangs.

I love being told I look like Zooey Deschanel, but it's hard to ignore the fact that I'm only told that just because we both have dark hair and bangs.

5. Feeling personally insulted every time someone makes a joke about bangs.

Bangs are the butt of a lot of jokes, and it feels like a shot in the heart every time.

6. Realizing how fast your hair grows.

You don't realize how fast your hair grows until you have to keep getting your bangs tripped every two to three weeks.

7. And the struggle of trying to cut them yourself.

We've all accidentally ruined our lives with a pair of scissors and a rash decision.

8. Forehead break outs are no big deal.

A pimple or two on the forehead is nothing because your bangs are there for you.

9. The weather is not your friend.

Rain, wind, snow and heat (all that sweating!) will sabotage your perfectly crafted bangs.

10. Knowing you didn't choose the bangs life.

Bangs aren't a conscious choice. Usually it's just what looks better on you. You couldn't not have bangs, even if you didn't want to.

11. But you're REAL proud that the bangs life chose you.

Bangs are different and fun, and you feel blessed that you were one of the few people chosen to be able to pull them off.

Cover Image Credit: The Fashion Spot

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To The Parent Who Chose Addiction

Thank you for giving me a stronger bond with our family.

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When I was younger I resented you, I hated every ounce of you, and I used to question why God would give me a parent like you. Not now. Now I see the beauty and the blessings behind having an addict for a parent. If you're reading this, it isn't meant to hurt you, but rather to thank you.

Thank you for choosing your addiction over me.

Throughout my life, you have always chosen the addiction over my programs, my swim meets or even a simple movie night. You joke about it now or act as if I never questioned if you would wake up the next morning from your pill and alcohol-induced sleep, but I thank you for this. I thank you because I gained a relationship with God. The amount of time I spent praying for you strengthened our relationship in ways I could never explain.

SEE ALSO: They're Not Junkies, You're Just Uneducated

Thank you for giving me a stronger bond with our family.

The amount of hurt and disappointment our family has gone through has brought us closer together. I have a relationship with Nanny and Pop that would never be as strong as it is today if you had been in the picture from day one. That in itself is a blessing.

Thank you for showing me how to love.

From your absence, I have learned how to love unconditionally. I want you to know that even though you weren't here, I love you most of all. No matter the amount of heartbreak, tears, and pain I've felt, you will always be my greatest love.

Thank you for making me strong.

Thank you for leaving and for showing me how to be independent. From you, I have learned that I do not need anyone else to prove to me that I am worthy of being loved. From you, I have learned that life is always hard, but you shouldn't give into the things that make you feel good for a short while, but should search for the real happiness in life.

Most of all, thank you for showing me how to turn my hurt into motivation.

I have learned that the cycle of addiction is not something that will continue into my life. You have hurt me more than anyone, but through that hurt, I have pushed myself to become the best version of myself.

Thank you for choosing the addiction over me because you've made me stronger, wiser, and loving than I ever could've been before.

Cover Image Credit: http://crashingintolove.tumblr.com/post/62246881826/pieffysessanta-tumblr-com

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You Shouldn't Be Ashamed Of Your Black Hair, Don't Let Anyone Tell You Differently

Growing up in predominantly white schools changed the way I felt about myself, including embracing my hair, but other people's opinion shouldn't stop you from embracing the beauty of your culture.

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Throughout my entire life, something I struggled with was my hair, even though I never really talked about it. I had never been very confident in it, and as I started to do it on my own, I struggled with keeping it healthy and eventually had to keep cutting it short to hide how damaged it was (still is).

I was constantly straightening it and got to a point where I was relaxing it every 3-4 weeks instead of the minimum point of 2-3 months. Every time it looked frizzy in the slightest, I'd text my mom and ask if she'd be able to lather on the chemicals that night. I thought what I was doing was okay and that my hair would somehow manage to become healthy again on its own, but it took me a really long time to admit to myself that I was damaging my hair because of my own insecurities.

This is the first time I'm being completely honest about all of these thoughts.

My first encounter with negative opinions about my hair was when I was in preschool, K4 to be exact, at a predominantly white school. I don't even remember much of it myself, but my mom would tell me how I would come home crying about kids calling me names such as "poodle" and would just constantly pick on me. All because of my hair. Sure, it may not seem that much now, but I was 4 years old. So, my mom decided to relax my hair, thinking that it'd make everything better.

But here comes the third grade. I was new at school and my only close friend was the only other black girl in my class. When my hair had gotten a bit wet during a relay race on field day, a kid in my class touched it and proceeded to ask why it felt like wheat grass.

That's when I stopped letting people touch my hair.

Constantly throughout middle school, I'd get told I had "white girl hair" and black girls would thrust their hand up my scalp to feel for weave tracks. This just encouraged me to do even more damage. But during the summer in-between grades, I would get my hair braided, and friends would text me asking "Why would you get a weave?" Just a few months ago, I had friends saying "I'm glad you never get a weave. I hope you never do that to your hair." This discouraged me from taking the precautions I should have been using to keep my hair protected, its fragile state not being made for being chemically straightened but to bounce freely as natural curls.

It had been almost 5 years since the last time I have braided my hair or done any protective styling in general because these things and the negative way my "friends" talked about me for it were sticking with me, making me think it was wrong to protect my hair. But now I plan on embracing the beauty of my hair and doing whatever I want, and whatever I think is necessary to help it while looking absolutely gorgeous while doing it, no matter what these "friends" think about it.

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