They say that life isn't worthwhile if you don't have people to share it with. And that couldn't be truer. The people who you have in your life should be there to build you up, not tear you down. When you surround yourself with those who bring distress or make you upset, it is only hindering your experiences.
Throughout my life, I changed friend groups every so often. I have always been the type of person who expected a lot, sometimes too much, from my friends. But as I've gotten older, I've begun to realize this isn't a bad thing. It reinforces my self-worth and makes me acknowledge what it is that I deserve. And you know what, I deserve to have friends and relationships in which I get back every ounce that I give. And it took me way too long to realize that.
Life is short. It's not always happy and fun. Sometimes its dark, and sad, and confusing. But when you have people who genuinely care, people who have your back no matter what, it makes you see the light at the end of the tunnel; to feel hopeful for the future. If you don't have people who make you feel like that, who you know without question you can call when you are having that breakdown and just sit and cry with them, you might need to reconsider your friendship.
Now, there's no denying that friends who are just there for fun times aren't bad to have. Sometimes it's nice to just have a good time without getting super deep. But in the end, those superficial friendships are not going to be the ones to get you through the hard times or check on you when they know you're not OK. In fact, they probably will be the ones making you upset from time to time.
I am a needy friend. I know that. But I will always give my all to the people I care about. I will always go out of my way to make sure they are happy, that their day gets a little better, to be their shoulder to cry on, or the person to make them laugh until they cry. And knowing your worth and what you have to give is the first step to realizing what you deserve in return.
From my own life experiences, it's the hard times that show people's true colors; when their true feelings and compassionate come out. This past year has shown me that and then some for my friends. For the ones who made me laugh when I was down, who got me a basket of things to put a smile on my face through tragedy, and who simply gave me a hug or a smile when I needed it, who simply asked if I was doing OK ... those are the people I want need in my life.
But I also know that history, even if it's good, doesn't equate to a great friendship. Life teaches you that lesson. I have realized some aren't here for the long haul, and that's OK. Knowing when to distance yourself from someone is completely healthy. I believe everyone comes into your life for a reason, often to teach us something about life or ourselves. I wouldn't know what I need out of life without the people who may have done me wrong or I had a falling out with. They are a part of my story and I wouldn't be the person I am today without them.
Life is too short to waste it on people who don't bring you happiness or make this wild ride worth it. So know your self-worth. Recognize what you deserve. Love the people who matter. Find the people who make you excited to go through this journey with them by your side.
