1. No we don't have snakes slithering around during church.

Although, you've probably heard about those Pentecostals who do have serpents hanging out during service. This is not true of all or even most of us today.

2. We don't wear skirts to bed.

yes, Pentecostals are " the skirt wearers" we wear them pretty much everywhere for modesty and biblical reasons. To bed? pajama pants and a tank top.

3. I'm not Mormon.

I really can't say that I even understand this correlation, and while we are on the topic we don't practice polygamy.

4. We do have electricity.

Once again, that's the wrong religion. we have lots of electricity and don't use covered wagons.

5. I'm not possessed.

Yes, I've actually had people ask if I'm possessed, like by a demon.

6. Inviting guests to church and they ask what time we get out.

Well, depends on how long the altar call is, and how many laps through the aisles Sister Mary is gonna run.

It never fails, every time we bring a visitor it's a throw down service.

I'm sure I've traumatized some friends over time when they come and they willingly go to the altar. Chances are their hearing is never the same after having someone screaming in tongues in their ears. Sorry.