If There Is One Thing You Need To Learn About Your S.O Right Now, It's Their Love Language
Start writing a post
Relationships

If There Is One Thing You Need To Learn About Your S.O Right Now, It's Their Love Language

There are five key love languages, what happens to be yours?

14
If There Is One Thing You Need To Learn About Your S.O Right Now, It's Their Love Language

Getting to truly know someone takes a long time. Every day you learn something new about your friends, significant others and family members.

So, why is it that as we get further into relationships we start assuming our loved ones can read our minds about what we want and need?

The truth is, we will never be able to read their minds. However, if you want to get pretty close to reading their minds, I recommend you learn their love language.

The concept of love languages was created by relationship counselor, Gary Chapman. The big picture of this concept is that we all express love differently, and sometimes, understanding those differences can give you insight into what your partner actually desires. There are five main ways we, as humans, express love.

Words of affirmation: Expressing love through spoken or written words. This includes written or oral reminders of appreciation, attraction, praise or affection.

Acts of service: Expressing love through helpful actions. This includes anything that makes your partner's life easier, such as: doing chores for them, making them a home-cooked meal or recording their favorite show.

Receiving gifts: Expressing love through symbolic gifts. This includes picking up souvenirs while you're away, surprising them with flowers or making a homemade gift.

Quality time: Expressing love through undivided, undistracted attention. This includes practicing a hobby together, talking about your day together or planning a date.

Physical touch: Expressing love through physical affection. This includes being intimate, hugging, public displays of affection or a shoulder to lean on.

Everyone, to some extent, values all these love languages, but most of the time, we have one or two languages that we value more than others.

For example, I know that I am a sucker for words of affirmation and acts of service. I personally feel the most loved when someone tells me out loud how much they love me. I also find it easiest to feel gracious when someone goes out of their way to make my life easier, like driving me to an appointment.

For a long time, I would often feel confused and unloved in my relationships.

After some research into this theory, and some serious self-reflection, I realized that my way of expressing and receiving love is not the only way to do it. What I viewed as my partners being distant, was actually just them having a different love language than I did.

There is a level of solace and understanding that comes when you realize you and your partner's love language. For example, my current partner is the complete opposite of me.

Of course, I am sure he appreciates how I compliment him to extremes and fold his laundry, but the reality is we have different love languages. Instead of sweet words and chores, he shows his love through signs of affection and giving me undivided attention.

When I realized "emotional mushy stuff" AKA, words of affirmation wasn't his love language, I learned to show that I care in ways that make sense to him, like hugs and building Minecraft houses together. Meanwhile, he learned that extra reassurance makes me feel extra loved. On the flip side, we also learned how we don't express affection. We both scored low on the giving and receiving gifts love language.

Love languages may not be the bandaid to every relationship issue you have, but knowing what's important to your loved ones can improve and maintain every relationship.

Learning love languages can help you communicate with your loved ones a little more efficiently, put things into perspective and may even teach you how to love yourself better too.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

How I Celebrate Valentine's Day

Every person, every couple celebrates Valentines in different ways, but there are a few things to keep in mind.

1191
How I Celebrate Valentine's Day
https://stokpic.com/project/love-heart-art-on-urban-street/

Ah, Valentines Day, a day of excitement for some and heart break for many. There are three kinds of people on Valentine's Day: the ones who make it a big deal, a little deal, and those who are single, but Valentine's Day can be fun for anyone if you have the right spirit in mind.

Keep Reading... Show less
Warner Bros. Television

1. You don't have to feel guilty about flirting with customers for tips (or just for shits and giggles).

2. You can be obnoxiously flirtatious with anyone you want. You are free to be that girl that flirts with everybody and makes 'em all smile (it's especially fun when the guy is as cute as Collin Jost). No shame.

3. Making random men nervous with your superior beauty and intense eye contact just for the hell of it is really amusing and empowering.

4. No one gives two poops if ya legs are hairy (your man shouldn't either but *Kermit the Frog meme* That's none of my business)

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Black History Month? Try Black History Year

What does Black History Month mean to you?

1665
madamenoire

African Americans have done so much and will forever be remembered for their accomplishments. In my opinion, there is no such thing as Black History Month. All year, we should celebrate the amazing poetry, music, inventions, and accomplishments that has surfaced over the last 100 years. Let's take a look...

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

A TikTok Ban? Nope, That's Not Happening

We've seen this movie before with the popular social media app.

4636
tiktok

Here we go again. There's a groundswell of support to ban TikTok in the United States.

Keep Reading... Show less
Content Inspiration

Top 3 Response Articles of This Week

Check out what's trending on Odyssey!

4765
writing on a page with a hand holding a pen as if the person is beginning to write something
c1.staticflickr.com

Looking for some inspiration to kick off your Monday? Check out these articles by our talented team of response writers! From poetry to tips for manifesting your dream life, there's something for everyone.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments