Music artist (and Michigan State Alumni) Quinn XCII, recently released his newest album "From Michigan With Love" This album is one of his most vulnerable and personal pieces of work, as he plays on the various stages and pains of heartbreak while emphasizing the importance of mental health.
Find me a boy that can express their feelings like Quinn XCII because damn, he says it all and he says it with well with lyrics full of vulnerability.
Holding Hands (feat. Elohim)
"Cause we don't talk about What we've known, Holding on to our egos, Till we both agree we've had enough, Since we stopped I can't help but eavesdrop, Holding hands in treetops Used to be our thing till we had enough"
In this song, Quinn XCII talks about mutual self-destruction. The break of a relationship of two stubborn people with egos that haven't figured out how to set aside their pride and communicate. He continues to talk about the pain of remembering all of those special words, places, and habits that you shared together.
"Why's my mind on autopilot all the time? I'm feeling like the world's back on rewind I can't seem to find the words to define The way I feel when I go through this My mind's on autopilot all the time"
This song captures the "replay curse"- where after a break up your mind falls into autopilot mode where you rewind and replay memories and moments in your head and get so caught up in the reflection that you feel stuck like you can't escape your mind and get out of your own head.
Life Must Go On
"Cause life must go on One blink, then it's all gone I said life must go on, Even when you know it's all wrong Whether you're high Whether you're low, Gotta keep on, be a part of the show I said life must go on"
This is my favorite song on the album. This song is a reminder that no matter what happens life must go on. Life is short and life is far from perfect. This song is about overcoming your worst days and appreciating your good ones and learning everything you can from them. We learn and grow the most often from our darkest days.
U & Us
"Remember, remember, when we said forever We locked it and we lost the key I'm begging, begging, begging, you to please don't go I don't wanna see you be with someone else Don't make me drive at night in Hollywood as evenings go I don't wanna put what we had on the shelf"
U & Us illustrates the feeling of wanting a relationship to work out so bad and not wanting to throw away that promise of forever. Wanting to be with someone so badly and wanting them to want you back. Quinn XCII talks about the fear of feeling alone and how terrifying that is, "I don't want to be lonely, I just want to be alone with you". Then of course how difficult it is to picture or see your ex with someone else.
Werewolf (feat. Yoshi Flower)
"Thought I got sick of your silhouette, But my hairs stand up every time that you are mentioned. Lately, I feel like the living dead, But secretly I hope it never ever ever ends"
In this song he is referring to telling yourself that you are over your ex and don't want to talk to them or see them so many times that part of you starts to believe that, that is until someone mentions them and your heart drops, your hair stands and that pain resurfaces making you feel like you're part of the living dead.
Tough (feat. Noah Kahan)
"I know you're actually weaker than that, let's open up and get deeper than that. Like why, why are you only vulnerable when no one's around? Your gym membership is not a crown." "But you're still insecure to me. Oh, so mess me up, I know you're not so tough."
This is to that certain someone who puts on a mask and acts tough and unbothered but is really broken and alone inside. The tough is almost this cold-hearted and detached alter ego that you don't recognize, which is how you know it's fake, it's not their true self you know who they really are and how they talk, act, care, and love. So it's about being able to remind yourself that they're not as tough as they want you to think, they're just faking to compensate for the loss of love.
"Why am I obsessed with self-destructiveness? Say I need you less. Cycle through refresh and fear of loneliness. Seems I'll never learn that bridges always burn" "All I see is cloudy smoke above me And you keep saying it's lovely, but I, but I, Bridges always burn. Find myself kneeling from all these caving ceilings, Something seems appealing to me"
In Matches, he focuses on the process of trying to move on and get over someone but being caught in a self-destructive cycle that keeps you trapped thinking about them and all the memories. He also covers not learning from your mistakes, the fear of being alone and seeing a situation differently than your ex-partner.
When I Die
"When I die, it's this I'll remember The wind moving the curtains in your room This moment's too good, I surrender 'Cause there's no space in time That compares to how I feel like right now"
In this song Quinn XCII is addressing that one amazing moment or memory that you can remember so vividly, one where you've felt happier than you ever have, when you realize how happy that other person makes you, how loved and safe you feel and he's saying that's the memory he wants to remember when he dies because that moment is too good to compare to any other space and moment in time.
Abel & Cain
"There's not a day, there's not a day That I think I deserve you, maybe I'm not strong as it seems and you figured me out. You're Abel, I'm Cain, I feel in the rain. Without you I feel I'm Hades. Can't understand how I could have had all of these doubts" "I missed you in front of my face.. wish I came to my senses now that I know you're here to stay"
This song targets self-doubt. Believing you aren't good enough and wanting to be better. Wishing you came to your sense in time to make changes and communicate.
"We don't wanna feel this bad Rather sweep it under the mat We take this red pill, green pill, black pill, I know deep down we're sad still. It's not normally how we act, They should see what's under our mask. We need something stronger than Advil. I know deep down we're sad still"
In this song, he covers how hard it is to numb the pain of a breakup and how truly long it takes to get over someone and heal and then how much longer than that it takes to be ready to start over with someone else and feel like you are giving them everything you have to offer. It's completely natural and okay to be sad and hurt, just make sure you're not making rash and impulsive decisions to numb your pain, because they're only temporary solutions and in the end, it won't make you feel any better.
Good Things Go
"I may not be the first to love you, but I wanna be the last When you know, then you know, and I can't let a good thing go I know I'm rough around the edges, not as smooth as the rest But I can promise you, when I'm with you, I'll love you the best"
This song is about wanting to be the last person to love someone. You know when someone and something is good when you are with them in person, interacting, laughing and living. This song is about fighting for someone who's worth it. Not letting go of a good thing, he emphasizes that good does not mean perfect and that everyone is rough around the edges but if someone can promise you that when they're with you they'll love you the best, they're worth fighting for.
Right Where You Should Be
"You are right where you should be You are right here next to me What do you need when you have everything? 'Cause you are right where you should be"
In this song, Quinn XCII focuses on just enjoying another person's company. Being in love with someone you consider to be one of your best friends- someone who can make you laugh, smile, feel less stressed, make you feel special, encourage you, support you, someone who knows you and loves you for all of your faults and all of your assets- with them is right where you should be.
Bandaids can't fix broken hearts, they take a lot of TIME to heal, but like Quinn XCII says "Life Must Go On" and when the time comes for me to give my heart to someone again this is what I've learned and this is what I'm working on getting ready to give:
1. Build respect - speak kindly to and about each other give each other space when needed to cool down, value each other's feelings, compromise, respect each other's boundaries
2. Communicate - Use the 48-hour rule (let it go and if it's still bothering you after 48 hours then find the right time to bring it up, talk face to face, use "I" statements, put your phone away and check your body language, trust each other
3. Freedom - Realize that you both need to have space and freedom in your relationship to do you
4. Fairness - Your opinions and feelings are both valid, and both matter equally, be able to compromise and put in equal effort.
5. The past is the past - If a situation has been resolved and moved on from its not fair to keep bringing them and using them against the other person, stop bringing up past arguments, they are not relevant.
If you love someone, communicate with them, through the good, the bad and the ugly. Life isn't perfect, love isn't perfect, people aren't perfect- and we're young! We are all still learning how to handle things, admit fault, forgive and forget. We are still learning how to be good people, friends, mothers, daughters, employees, etc.
Relationships are about trial and error learning about what works and what does not work and figuring out what is not going to be an effective solution and what is. Focus on your solutions, not your problems, because chances are both of you are hurting, both of you are exhausted, both of you want better, so when you're fighting don't run a cross country race, play a soccer game. Stop racing each other and work together to communicate, to learn, to get better, to get stronger, together.
Love is NOT "IF" or "BECAUSE", Love is "ANYWAY" and "EVEN THOUGH" and "IN SPITE OF" -Unknown.
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