Parents Are Bullies

Overprotective, Small Town Parents Deserve A Degree In Reputations Based Off Their 'B.S.'

I shouldn't be bitter, but I still am.

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I come from a small town in America's heartland, a true American town, surrounded by cornfields in all directions. The biggest events that take place are high school sporting events, where the entire town shows up, regardless of how terrible we are. We have one or two cops on duty at the same time, whose main job is to patrol the streets and bust underage drinking. It's a small town where nothing happens.

The big drama from the town comes from its people. More specifically, the grown adults, the parents – the antagonists – who entertain themselves by making something out of nothing, from the lives of kids – their protagonists.

I think the biggest favorite pastime of some parents were crossing-the-line and being nosey into the lives of kids other than their own– because their own kid could never do wrong. Parents were ruthless growing up, and I'm petty and hold a grudge.

Parents would pose as their children on Facebook to attack sixth graders through comments because they were "leaving their kid out."

Parents would whisper rude comments into their children's ears about their classmates, which then, of course, would be passed along to their friends, creating a reputation for that child.

Parents would take their kid's phone to text back their child's friends with messages that would make The Plastic's Burn Book look nice.

Parents would yell and shout cruel things at youth sporting events attacking *other* children's athletic performance making sports, not a fun activity, but a personal Hell for many.

If a peer got a piercing, colored their hair in an experimental way, listened to the 'wrong' music, dressed abstractly, or didn't confine themselves to the social norms, they were perceived as weird, troubled, or seemingly had parents that didn't care about them. Being different, finding your voice, discovering your style, or being experimental was discouraged and would automatically make you an out-group. True bullshit.

I'm sure parents can be that cruel and ruthless in towns of all sizes, but in a small town when grown adult parents have more power than its mayor and law enforcement, they control everything. From sports, social lives, academia, and even college scholarships, the reputations parents create for you will haunt you until you break free, if you are lucky.

If you are unfortunate to have the parents of your community not on your side, it can be Hell. When you have enough parents that feel strongly about a particular issue, the equivalent to a union can be developed.

An example of this is when a "party" was busted (I say "party" because it was a small gathering in a friend's garage where leisurely drinking was taking place– there wasn't loud music, heavy drinking, or raging going on) and a jealous classmate called the cops on it, which resulted in tickets for all of its attendees. A group of around 10 of us received tickets– and it was like a damn arson crime was committed. I will take full responsibility that it was wrong and we were underage so the tickets were deserved, but what we did not deserve was the community outcry.

Parents went ballistic. As 15 and 16-year-olds, when you have grown adults talking down on your character and openly judging you through Facebook, at school events, and creating rumors, it turns a common adolescent mistake and experience into a trauma. There were parents discussing developing an anti-drinking campaign against us claiming that a mistake like ours would be "life-ruining". Jokes on them because we are all still here, and most of us are thriving.

Their kids went ballistic as well, which is especially ironic now, because as soon as senior year came around, the classmates that so openly talked against us and judged us, got in the habit of blacking out on the weekends and developed an appreciation for underage drinking as a hobby. Underage drinking is still underage drinking regardless if you are a junior in high school, or a senior, friends.

I'm no longer bitter towards the classmates' cruelty, but I do have a slight grudge towards the parents. Parents are grown adults who should know that shit happens. You have to go through moments, like getting caught drinking underage, to learn and grow. Shit happens and you have to accept your wrongs and move on. These parents must have been perfect growing up, obviously, considering they still have sticks up their asses and would start a parent union against a group of 15 and 16-year-olds.

My parents know that they got caught up in the bullshit of being parents in small towns. I watched them get caught up in the narrow-mindedness small town parents can have. Countless times growing up they told me I couldn't do something because _____ was involved and they were "trouble," simply because there were unpleasant rumors going around the parent-community, and they didn't want me to be associated.

My parents would say things about other peers of mine without thinking twice that they were adolescents just trying to find their way. They know they were wrong because I made it known. It also took a strain on our relationship. There were instances growing up we would fight over something and it didn't matter if the situation we were fighting about was true or not, all that mattered was the effect it would have on my reputation – and that destroyed me for a little bit.

I hope something has changed within the last ten years, and millennial parents aren't as cruel. I hope kids can make mistakes and are encouraged to do better, rather than be bullied by adults. I hope parents now understand that not all kids have the same resources as others, and they won't be punished or pushed away because their parent(s) can't provide them with the same things as they provide their child with. I hope kids now are encouraged to find their voices and be experimental, rather than be deemed as weird or troubled.

I hope parents are doing better.

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8 Reasons Why My Dad Is the Most Important Man In My Life

Forever my number one guy.
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Growing up, there's been one consistent man I can always count on, my father. In any aspect of my life, my dad has always been there, showing me unconditional love and respect every day. No matter what, I know that my dad will always be the most important man in my life for many reasons.

1. He has always been there.

Literally. From the day I was born until today, I have never not been able to count on my dad to be there for me, uplift me and be the best dad he can be.

2. He learned to adapt and suffer through girly trends to make me happy.

I'm sure when my dad was younger and pictured his future, he didn't think about the Barbie pretend pageants, dressing up as a princess, perfecting my pigtails and enduring other countless girly events. My dad never turned me down when I wanted to play a game, no matter what and was always willing to help me pick out cute outfits and do my hair before preschool.

3. He sends the cutest texts.

Random text messages since I have gotten my own cell phone have always come my way from my dad. Those randoms "I love you so much" and "I am so proud of you" never fail to make me smile, and I can always count on my dad for an adorable text message when I'm feeling down.

4. He taught me how to be brave.

When I needed to learn how to swim, he threw me in the pool. When I needed to learn how to ride a bike, he went alongside me and made sure I didn't fall too badly. When I needed to learn how to drive, he was there next to me, making sure I didn't crash.

5. He encourages me to best the best I can be.

My dad sees the best in me, no matter how much I fail. He's always there to support me and turn my failures into successes. He can sit on the phone with me for hours, talking future career stuff and listening to me lay out my future plans and goals. He wants the absolute best for me, and no is never an option, he is always willing to do whatever it takes to get me where I need to be.

6. He gets sentimental way too often, but it's cute.

Whether you're sitting down at the kitchen table, reminiscing about your childhood, or that one song comes on that your dad insists you will dance to together on your wedding day, your dad's emotions often come out in the cutest possible way, forever reminding you how loved you are.


7. He supports you, emotionally and financially.

Need to vent about a guy in your life that isn't treating you well? My dad is there. Need some extra cash to help fund spring break? He's there for that, too.

8. He shows me how I should be treated.

Yes, my dad treats me like a princess, and I don't expect every guy I meet to wait on me hand and foot, but I do expect respect, and that's exactly what my dad showed I deserve. From the way he loves, admires, and respects me, he shows me that there are guys out there who will one day come along and treat me like that. My dad always advises me to not put up with less than I deserve and assures me that the right guy will come along one day.

For these reasons and more, my dad will forever be my No. 1 man. I love you!

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7 Life Lessons My Parents Taught Me

Your parents have been there from the start, and have no doubt shaped you into the person you are today

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I'm so grateful for everything that my parents have done for me. Even more so, I'm incredibly grateful for all of the life lessons over the years. At this point, they've taught me way too many life lessons to list here. However, I thought I'd take the time to write down seven of the most important ones!

1. Be Respectful. 

If there is one thing my dad has instilled in me from a young age, it's to always be respectful. I have always been impressed with my dad's ability to stay cool and calm in situations where that's the last thing anyone would expect from him, and he has taught me the importance of maintaining a respectful and mature attitude, even when life gives you the sourest lemons.

2. Be bold. 

My mom is the coolest woman I know, and she has always taken on life the only way she knows how: with unbelievable boldness and fierceness. Being bold means not being afraid to be different or to stand out, and my mom has taught me how badass it is to be the true version of yourself.

3. Be forgiving. 

Arguments and fights are unavoidable parts of life, and ever since I was little, my dad has consistently reminded me of how important it is to pick your battles. Knowing when it's time to pick up the pieces and move on is essential in order to be a forgiving person, not only to yourself but to others as well.

4. Be generous.

Growing up, I was fortunate enough to be spoiled by my parents. Not only was I lucky enough to go on vacations and get beautiful gifts around my birthday and holidays, but I was especially lucky enough to be spoiled by my parent's love and kindness. Being generous, not only financially, but with your ability to love and respect other people is something I am so thankful my parents have taught me.

5. Work hard. 

Both my mom and dad are incredibly hard-working people. Growing up, there were times where my dad worked 12-hour days, and my mom juggled work, household chores, and taking care of me. Even though their hard work resulted in some sacrifices, they always did what was best for my sister and I. My parents have naturally pushed me to be a hardworking person in all aspects of my life, and I think it's a very admirable quality.

6. Be kind.

My dad is the type of person who will always stop in an intersection to give money to a homeless person, and my mom is the type of woman to never think twice about sacrificing her own needs to help others. Both my parents have shown me, along with the rest of the world, what it means to be kind and selfless, and I can only hope I will one day be as good at it as they are.

7. Stand up for yourself. 

Before I came to college, I often found myself doing what everyone else wanted me to do. I jumped into things quickly, hoping it would please others and make them like me. However, once I got to college, I quickly called my mom on the phone, crying because I regretted some decisions I had made. My mom told me how important it is to stand up for yourself, learn to say no, and only do the things you really want to do. Learning to live your life for you, and not let other people rule your universe is key to being happy, and I'm fortunate that my mom helped me realize this.

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