From the first day we met is seemed as sheer fate. I couldn’t plan a meeting any better than that. The one passion I had shared throughout my life, you did too. From our first date, great conversation and a shared kiss that didn’t feel like any normal kiss but in my head an amazing one. As the times got better, you got worse.
As we built a life and moved in together, got a dog, and brought our friends and lives together, you got worse. Starting with jealousy with not just other men but my closest friends you tore me away from the people I loved the most. When making a minor mistake, you made me pay for it instead of loving me for who I was.
When then cheating on me you made me feel guilty for what I did instead of being sorry about the horrible mistake and suffering you put me through. When having aggression that scared me more than anything you made me feel sorry for you as if it was something that you could not control. I stayed. I cried but I moved on to still believe that you loved me more than anyone could and that I loved you.
When getting dressed to go out on dates you made me feel as if what I was wearing was too revealing. I was trying to attract guys in my way so that I could do the one thing that I knew I would never do to you but that you had already done to me. At this point I was broken I had fallen for the manipulation and games that you had put me through. I was not the strong confident person that my parents had raised me to be, I was broken.
The day you hit me, I felt helpless and crushed but not broken anymore. I immediately walked away and knew that you had not won, but I had. The suffering and heartbreak that you put me through has only made me stronger. You did not break me. I will now find someone who loves me for who I am, is as loyal as I am going to be to them, and only touches me in affectionate ways of love instead of ways of aggression and hate. I will not make myself pay for what you did by pushing away someone I know could be great for me. You are a boy and I will find a man. Other men are not the enemy, you are. If you broke me I would still be with you, but you did not break me, you just made me stronger.
