I've never been the type to hold grudges or have regrets of a situation. But sometimes I do wish things were different and you were still around.

I will never understand how people can just be a great friend one day to barely acknowledging your existence another. I'm thankful to have had your friendship when I did but I also think it isn't something that needed to end. Being a friend shouldn't be looked at as a job but something you want to do.

I hope you are doing well in life and thriving at whatever you are doing but I miss having someone to be able to confide in without any judgments. Friendship shouldn't be one sided so I would rather you be gone than deal with that but it was something I hoped you would have wanted to keep going. I thought you actually cared about me and my life.

You know all my secrets and I feel like I know most of yours, so it hurts that someone you told so much is becoming a distant memory. All the nights we stayed up gossiping, all the times we had epic texting going making fun of that person we both despised. Those days when one of us was going through a breakup and we could count on the other to make you feel better with the aid of ice cream. I'm thankful I had that person when I needed it but now I've lost that safe and unjudging person to go to.

I miss those days of going to bonfires, fairs, planning that spring break vacation that we never took, and talking about our weddings that we would one day have. We were always laughing, planning and dreaming about the future and I thought you would be in mine. But now I cannot compare to your new friends and all the new memories they are giving you but try not to forget those who were always there.

We may have seemed disposable to you but when those temporary friends are gone who will you have because I gave up on our friendship when you stopped caring about how my life was going. I may no longer seem as exciting or as fun but we did grow up with each other and that is a different bond.

I don't say this to be mean or spiteful but I do want you to take a step back and remember how was here when you needed to talk at 2 am, or who dropped everything she was doing because you needed a shoulder to cry on. I wouldn't want to take back those things but I do hope you remember what a true and loyal friend I was.

And maybe one day you won't be so distant, or you'll feel a little sorry for forgetting about us back home, but I still hope you are doing okay. I still hope the best for you.