I've read my fair share of social media posts and open letters over the years that have generally agreed that skinny-shaming isn't a big deal. The body positivity movement says that all body types should be celebrated, yet people are still shaming each other left and right. Even though it goes against the body positivity movement, society also tends to claim that skinny-shaming is okay because others would "love to be our size".
There are a lot of misconceptions about what exactly skinny-shaming is and why it's not okay. I've been told more times than I can count that I should just go "eat a cheeseburger". Now, I'm one of the rare people who doesn't even like burgers to start with. Based on that alone, I shouldn't be told I "need" to eat one; however, this is your way of telling me I need to gain weight. Why? Why is it okay for you to tell me to eat more and to gain weight, but it's extremely frowned upon for me to tell you the reverse?
Being the size I am isn't something I can control. I eat what I want, and I don't workout constantly. I haven't intentionally made myself the weight that I am. My being small doesn't give you the right to make negative comments about my body type. It doesn't give you the right to assume that I'm anorexic or have any other sort of eating disorder. Those are real things, and your thought that I should be bigger doesn't justify you making fun of those. Why do you feel the need to constantly tell me in a rude manner that I'm too small? Do you think I've suddenly forgotten what size I am? Trust me, I haven't, but you remind me anyway.
My own insecurities shouldn't be brushed off as me being whiny just because the "ideal body size" is thin. You can't later turn around and decide that, actually, I should have more insecurities because nobody wants to see my bones. I've seen plenty of posts stating that "real men" prefer curves over bones, unlike dogs, and women shouldn't be making these posts just to bash smaller women. That's how my body's built, and I understand that's just how it is. You don't get to tell me how I should or shouldn't feel about it. You also don't get to decide how I feel or look in different kinds of clothing. Being this size, it's harder to find clothing that fits than you would think. Often times, companies don't make extra smalls, or their smalls still aren't small enough. You tell me you'd "love to have that problem", but you don't understand that it's a real issue. It isn't just me complaining to make people feel bad for me, so please don't tell me "well, if you would just gain weight..."
Body-shaming in general needs to stop, and it starts with us accepting that we aren't all going to be built the same. There is no perfect body type. You can't validate shaming how someone looks or how they feel about their looks based on what society is telling you to think. The problem will never truly go away, but we can definitely work towards diminishing it. Skinny-shaming is a real thing, so please, the next time you think about telling me I should gain weight or do something to hide my body, don't.
