To the 'Over-thinker',

I want to start off by saying how much overthinking I've done in my life. It could probably do enough regular thinking for about 10 people in a single day. It is such a hard habit to overcome especially when it's prevalent in every day events. Stemming from a multiple choice test, a relationship where things are uneasy, or simply getting done with a single sprint at morning conditioning. It is something that can cause unnecessary stress and could potentially harm your self confidence. Sometimes it gets to a point where a person says, "ok" instead of "okay great," and I think something is wrong. THAT IS A PROBLEM (haha). Although most of the time I laugh about it once I focus on calming down or snapping out of the phase, but other times it sure does get the best of me.

Recognizing this type of negative thinking is so crucial in the process of fixing it. Sometimes it does take someone to say, 'that isn't at all what I said,' or 'where did you get that from?' Half the time, it is hard to tell if what you're feeling is accurate or if it is something that you, personally, have blown out of proportion. The annoying part about overthinking everything is the fact it does affect the people around you. They may feel annoyed whenever they feel like you're over analyzing a little sentence that was said or they may even think you're too emotional for no reason. Miscommunication is so common when you are talking to someone who overthinks the conversation. But knowing how to deal with the facts instead of the 'made-up' stories or scenario will help you self regulate.

Some of the things that help me over come these thoughts have to do with training my brain to think differently in certain situations. The biggest and most useful tool in recognizing and validating what you understand is accurate, is to ask questions. Instead of asking the questions to yourself, try asking the person who actually did the talking. Start at the primary source first then evaluate your feelings about it. Don't assume that what you understand is the only way the story goes. Everyone knows that there are other ways to look at situations and that is important because it may lead to decrease in stress about what was said. If you can't go directly to the source of what you're overthinking, ask a friend. But choose wisely, go to a friend who you see as someone who is unbias in situations and just see what a third party has to say. You may not like their answer, but again, it is another way a situation can be taken.

All in all, over thinking does warp situations into a negative atmosphere if you let it. Self checking is important. Don't get overwhelmed to the point where now you're lashing out and haven't really tried to see the other side. Obviously, it is easier said than done. But knowing a way that works for you whenever you feel yourself losing confidence or getting ahead of yourself, can improve your mood substantially. For me, it's asking questions. Saying, "I think I am missing what you said and I want to know what it means before I think differently." That helps better communication in a relationship or in school by simply wanting to move on and improve the situation rather than impair it with made up scenarios. Another way could be to occupy your mind to a point where there isn't enough time to over think a situation. But the best way to ensure a secure mind about things that go on in your life definitely correlate to the confidence you have in the knowledge and experiences you have gone through. Don't take experience and always turn it into a bad thing, make it a learning stone and grow from it.