Dear Open Letters,

What are you? In a time where the mail system is literally dying because no one writes letters, what even is an open letter? This is a serious question and one day I would really like an answer. I’m actually trying to picture what an open letter would be and I can’t think of anything. Would it be a letter you go around putting in random people mailboxes, like spam? Would you print a bunch of vaguely written letters and just start taping them places? I mean, essentially, that’s what is happening when an open letter is written and posted on Facebook.

I understand that people have lots of pent up anger and feelings that many relate to and so they want to share them, but maybe the open letter isn’t the way to do it. Instead of targeting an ex-boyfriend or ex-best friend, maybe go beyond that when you write and tackle why you’re mad at them instead of just basically ranting for a page and a half.

The open letter is basically the new long Facebook post. Remember those? From the early 2000's? Man, those were great. Except now, you don’t have to write what you feel to rant about it. Instead, someone else can write vaguely about someone you’re mad at and you can passive aggressively post it and hope for the best. Exciting! My recommendation is to actually write the person you’re mad at a personal letter, or if that’s not your thing (which I’m guessing it isn’t, because like I mentioned before the mail system is dying) maybe just talk to them in person.

I think at their core open letters are trying to get some sort of change to come from them. So I guess you’re hoping your ex-boyfriend reads your article, that he probably knows is about him, and changes, which I think is pretty unrealistic and a conversation would handle this better - but I guess it’s not my place to say. Or maybe you just want some internet fame. Hey, nothing wrong with that just own up to it. I’ll be honest I guess open letters to things that’ll happen in the future make sense since you haven’t met them yet, but still.

I’m not saying stop writing, I’m just saying word it differently or choose a more appropriate audience or medium. Sometimes things should be read by everyone…sometimes they shouldn’t. I feel like most open letters don’t need to be read by everyone, so maybe just email the people you want to hear what you have to say. Maybe even just change the title and stop writing it as a letter. There are a lot of options out there, but if I see the words “an open letter to” again I might implode, and I definitely won't read it (surprising, I'm sure).

Yes, I do get the irony of what I’m writing-it’s on purpose.

Anyways, this letter of mine has gone on far too long, as most open letters do and even I am starting to wonder what the purpose is (total open letter move #TOLM). So I’m going to end on these words of wisdom I made up myself (another #TOLM), “Stop.”

Sincerely,

That girl you’ve never met and never will meet.