First of all, welcome. The decision you made to embark on a journey to a new place is admirable, and only few will choose to be so bold. For that, you are rare, and that means that the universe has a specific plan for you if you allow the experience to work magic on you.
You’ve already unpacked your boxes, and you’re probably just becoming acquainted by all the new sights and sounds of this new place. It’s probably confusing, and your GPS is probably re-routing 24/7. You also are probably confused as to where the Starbucks is, or the cheapest gas station in your neighborhood but with time, those things will become normal and everything won’t feel so abstract. Part of this new change will feel liberating, fresh and exciting. You’re an explorer of the world, and you are curious enough to give it a chance, to see what all the hype is about, to allow yourself to get a change of perspective.
However, there is a very real sense of fear once all of that excitement wears off. When you move somewhere new you are completely out of your element. Most likely your family is not around the corner anymore, and your group of friends are still right where you left them. You are immersed in a totally new environment with no sense of who you are or where you belong- and that is a very valid and scary feeling.
Perhaps what brought you to make such a change was following someone else, because you love them and want to grow with them. Or maybe you just needed a complete change in your surroundings because you were not able to grow anymore where you were previously. Regardless, you have endless opportunities that will present themselves to you if you are open, patient and peaceful.
It sure isn’t easy to find a job, and hell, finding one you want and can tolerate is a whole other battle. But part of being somewhere new is feeling this sense of discomfort and trying to make sense of it. When you uproot the tree from it’s place in the ground, the roots are still alive, waiting to be replanted wherever you decide to move it. I want you to be patient and to stay strong and determined that the right position will come your way that will be everything you need for a short while to get by and to start to replant your roots. Whatever it is may not be ideal, but nothing is permanent, and you will have many more changes throughout your journey here.
Half of life is figuring out what you don’t want so that you can identify what you do. I’ve lived in three different locations in the past six years and each and I go through the same feelings each time I change cities. You’re going to feel lonely. A huge part of our identities is who we are when we are with our friends, and not having that feeling of support can make you depressed and even more isolated than you already are. Please rest assured that I am here to be that friend that helps ease that feeling. I’ve been in your shoes and I know how it feels. Girlfriend, you are going to be just fine if you stay strong, I promise.
The last thing that I can’t stress enough is to not run away or run back to whatever you just left behind. You can always go through life thinking the past was better than what it was, when in reality you were probably unhappy in some ways at that point, too. I know a huge part of wanting to run is running away from something inside of you that you don’t want to face. We gain absolutely nothing by staying within our comfort zones. You will never learn what you are fully capable of achieving if you do not allow yourself to feel emotional, vulnerable and scared. I promise those feelings will pass. They will one day start to dwindle down when you come into your new routine of waking up, going to work, eating at new places and establishing relationships with people you cross paths with. Be open to everyone, tell them you just moved there. Most people in this world are kind hearted and will be willing to grab a drink with you for happy hour, at least. You must put yourself out there. You have to be willing to let go of your fears.
The hardest part of this entire transition is the first 3 months. You will go back and forth between tears and happiness so many times it might actually scare you. Please remember, this is 100% natural and a normal response to change. It will get easier with time. Give yourself 6 months to a year to really get a feel for this new life. You might be surprised at how long you’ll end up wanting to stay. And if at that point, you’re still miserable? Fine, move back to wherever you just were. But I can guarantee that you will be gone again, and you’ll have to go through these feelings once more, and that doesn’t sound super fun, right? It is your time to come out of your cocoon. I believe in you and will always be here to pick you up when you’re feeling down. So soar, butterfly, soar.
Xoxo
Linds
