Hey, girl. It's me--well, you, but three years in the future. Right now, you should be almost halfway through your sophomore year of high school, and a semester away from being halfway through high school itself. You're also probably starting to feel the pressure of choosing a college. I wish I could tell you that everything gets way easier, that life is totally fair, and that everyone loves you. None of these things are true. The rest of high school will be just as difficult, and college isn't exactly a walk in the park. Some things you will never understand and some people will never like you despite how hard you try. High school girls are some of the meanest people on this earth and that's something that will probably never change.
Junior year is going to be the hardest year of your life, for many reasons. College decisions and applications are going to weigh everyone down, but you'll find out that life likes to throw everything at you at once. So, no, the boy you think is your soulmate is actually not even close to being that. And you'll eventually have the courage to cut out those toxic friends, even though you can't imagine getting through high school without them. Trust me, you do. Many of these things will make you feel like your life is over, or like you couldn't possibly survive each new curveball the universe will throw at you. You always make it through, but you never have to do it alone. As lonely as those tough nights feel, your best friends and your mom are always there to support you.
Speaking of your best friends and your mom. You should definitely be a little nicer to them. I know you feel like nobody understands you, or that nobody even tries. But it's not always about understanding because most of the time you don't even understand yourself. It's about being able to climb into Mom's bed when you can't sleep because somehow you always manage to fall right asleep with her. It's about your best friends taking the time to have movie nights or coffee runs or study dates just to distract you from everything that's going on. I promise that they're all trying to help you and just don't know how. Don't take them for granted. They'll be there for you even after you treat them terribly, but they don't have to be. They deserve better than that.
Nothing ever happens exactly as you hope it will, but I promise that you will survive everything life throws at you. I can't really guarantee anything past the age of eighteen (almost nineteen!), but that's a solid three years that I'm giving you the green light for. You're going to be okay. You will always have at least one person who loves you unconditionally. And life goes on, no matter what.
