An Open Letter To My (Soon To Be) Divorced Best Friend

An Open Letter To My (Soon To Be) Divorced Best Friend

Here's to your bright future.

Jessie,

I know that you’re going through something incredibly difficult right now. I won’t pretend to understand the gravity of your loss. I would never diminish your pain by telling you over and over that it isn’t a big deal or that it’ll be just fine. This is a big deal. You spent years investing in a future with a partner that you chose and that you loved deeply. You gave pieces of yourself to someone that no one else on this earth has ever or probably will ever know. You can’t have those back now. He took your secrets and your love and he left. I’m sorry. If I could take it away, I would (obviously), but all the sympathy in the world will not change his decision.

There are somethings I want you to try and remember, though, as you move forward from this. First of all, there is a major difference between being lonely and being alone. You are going to feel both, possibly at the same time. Do not allow yourself to fall into this feeling so much that you forget how truly together you are. You are not alone. You are not single. You are not lost in a world that makes absolutely no sense. At the end of every single day, you are surrounded by an army of people who believe in you and who have faith in your strength and perseverance. Remember that.

Your daughter is going to be keeping a close eye on you - like she always has. Keep it in mind that she is learning from you. Let her see what a strong and capable woman looks like. Give her something to be proud of. Let her see how well and easily you can stand on your own two feet and move forward with your life and hers. And on days when you can’t be strong. When the grief and pain are too much to bear, let her see what it looks like to be human. Let her know that there is no such thing as perfection and that it is more than ok to grieve.

When the irrational fear of being alone sets in, don’t let it. Remind yourself of a few key things. Everyone loves you. Everyone. You are easily one of the most beautiful people on this earth, inside, and especially out. And you have an amazing ass. Super smackable.

One of the most important things you can remind yourself of is that a woman of God kneels for no man. If he is truly leaving you for good, let him. You are stronger without a man who can’t make up his mind and you are more than enough without him. If he wants to come back and you want to let him, that is okay, but don’t beg him to stay or come home. When you find yourself falling to your knees, take the opportunity to pray for peace and strength.

The thing that you must always try to remember, is that every single thing in life is an opportunity to learn and grow. Take it. Learn whatever you can from this and find your own self.

I love you and will always stand by you.

Cover Image Credit: Rebbeccha Felice

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A Letter To My Sister For Her First Semester In College

Some Advice to My Sister For Her First Semester

To My Sister,

I'm going to start by saying how proud I am of you and your accomplishments thus far and making it to the first step of a long but important journey of your life, college.

It seems like only yesterday we were just two kids who wanted to both be pop stars when we grew up so we prepared by performing at places like nursing homes and festivals to prepare (even though we got over that phase by the time we hit 5th grade). I'm writing this letter to you in hopes of giving good advice and wisdom from my 5 years of struggling as a college student.

Never Give Up On ANYTHING

You need to believe that you can do anything that you set your mind to because YOU CAN. I know it seems like the impossible when you're trying to pull that first all-nighter to finish a paper that is due in the morning but you got this! Even if you don't believe in yourself just remember that I do.

Stay Focused On What You Want To Accomplish

College is an awesome, fun experience in your life and I know how distracting everything else can be but make sure to focus on your projects and assignments. I know I sound like our mom but trust me when I say do your assignments for your classes because good grades lead to the things that you want most to accomplish in the future. Stay focused on what you want to accomplish and the rest will follow suit.

Always Know I'm Here For You

I promise that I will always be a text or call away if you need any help with anything. Even if you are having a tough time with deciding what you want from Taco Bell, just give me a call. You also have a wonderful family that will make a great support system (You know because I'm part of that family). I will always be by your side no matter what happens; it is kind of my job as your big sister after all.

Go Out And Explore

Explore on your own and figure out what you are most passionate about. Go join some clubs or participate in an intramural sports team. Find your passion; who knows it might just lead to what you want to do for the rest of your life.

Have Fun

Go make some friends, go to social events organized by the campus, go party (just not too hard). Remember that there is always time to take a break from the work of college and have a little fun. You can't just sit in your room all day and study till your brain is fried. Working hard comes with the relief of having a break every once in a while as well. College is a once in a lifetime experience so don't miss out on it.

I love you with all of my heart. We have been through thick and thin together and can't wait to see what the future has for the two of us. I'm ready to see what you can accomplish and know that YOU CAN DO IT!

With Love,

Your Big Sis



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When You're The Youngest Sibling, This Is Your Life

The youngest siblings always get thrown under the bus, but we win our parents' hearts.

Being the youngest sibling definitely has its perks, and your older siblings are jealous. Your parents take your side in arguments that you start, you get to take clothes, and you are able to boss around your older siblings to drive you around. It's not always the greatest being the youngest sibling, however, because you are constantly being watched and must live up to the standards of your oldest brother or sister.

1. Sneaking through your older siblings' closet

Being the youngest sibling means free clothes; however, it’s not very simple snatching these clothes from your sibling’s closets. There’s a strategy to sneaking around, but the second you hear footsteps up the stairs, you suddenly become a track star.

2. Lasting impressions on teachers

You are never excited to see a teacher on your schedule that your older sibling once had. “Oh you’re _____’s sister?” can either mean a constant competition to live up to your sibling’s standards or an automatic terrible first impression because of your sibling’s misbehavior in the past.

3. Your parents always take your side

Let’s face it, you constantly fight like cats and dogs with your siblings. Even if you started the battle, your parents always take your side.. Watching your older siblings get punished after because of something you started was always the best sight to see.

4. You have your own chauffeur

Your older siblings are always there to drive you around, and they can’t say no to the baby of the house. However, when your siblings picked you up, it could have been really embarrassing.

5. Baby pictures who?

Remember when you had to look for a cute #tbt or a baby picture for your senior yearbook, and all you could find was pictures of your older siblings? Your parents had professional photo shoots for the older brothers and sisters, but the only pictures you could find of yourself were only a few snapshots in the back of the albums.

6. They know how to push your buttons

The teasing never ends when you’re the youngest of the family. Your siblings know exactly how to make you angry, and they will constantly do so even after you throw a meltdown.

7. They're always on your case

You don’t get any privacy as the youngest. Your siblings always know what is happening in your life. You constantly think of new ways to keep your life private, but it always fails.

8. The oldest sibling gets priority, and you get hand-me-downs

You usually get your way in most situations, but when it comes to big items, seniority rules. You have to act like this doesn't hurt you. When doesn't the youngest sibling get their way?

9. You’re thankful to have them by your side

Through constant unjust battles, hair pulling and stealing clothes, you are more than thankful to have great role models to look up to. No one messes with you because they have to go through your older siblings first.

No matter how many hairs are pulled, skin is broken, or clothes are stolen, siblings always stick together.

Cover Image Credit: Erica Wriedt

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