An Open Letter To Children Of Divorced Parents

An Open Letter To Children Of Divorced Parents

Just in time for the holiday season.
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Dear Children of Divorced Parents,

With Halloween over, the most dreaded time of the year is upon us. The month of November is the official start of the holiday season for most Americans. For some people, this is their favorite time of the year. Unfortunately, children of divorced parents see it a different way. That’s you. When your parents first got divorced, everyone tells you how jealous they are of you: you’ll now get two birthdays, multiple Christmases or Kwanzaa’s, two Thanksgiving dinners or more gifts for Hanukkah. While that statement is true in a way, the multiple holidays also bring immense stress for some of us.

Almost every holiday you’ll be forced to ask yourself if it was your mom’s turn or your dad’s turn to have you. Did they have you last year or was it two years ago now? Will one parent get you for lunch on Thanksgiving or for dinner? What if they both decide to have Thanksgiving at the same time? Will one parent have a place to go if you end up with the other parent? Or will they spend the holiday alone?

A big choice you’ll have to possibly make is which parent will not have their kid on a major holiday. Believe me, I understand how completely difficult it is to have that hanging over your head. You may or may not love each parent equally, but if you do, the guilt you feel is real, and over time, that feeling never really fades away.

Maybe one day your parents will get remarried, and this is good in a way, but for the holiday season it only adds to the chaos. On Christmas Eve, you’ll go to your mom’s house, then to her mom’s house. On Christmas, you’ll go to your dad’s house, then his mom’s house. Then the next day, you’ll have to go to your new stepdad’s family’s house and so on. Christmas is no longer daylong but rather a week long. And when you’re spending so much time traveling back and forth, the real meaning of Christmas is lost. And this can be true for any holiday, not just Christmas. It’s no longer known as a day to celebrate, but a day to pretend like this is the normal way to celebrate holidays. And it really isn’t.

Not being able to celebrate as a family during holidays kills us more than people realize. Anyone who comes from a divorced family dreams of the days when their parents were still together. You wish for the chance to go back so you can truly appreciate what little time you had as a complete family. If your parents didn’t have a good divorce, this only adds to the stress of the holidays. Some of you may have been lucky enough to have parents who are still friends, but I guarantee that that is almost always not the way it works. When your parents hate each other, there’s a big chance that they’ll try and pit you against the other parent. So for holidays, insults about how one parent celebrated or what they got you for the holiday get thrown around. It will be a competition until the very end.

Speaking of gift giving, that can become very tricky too. Your parents will only get so much time with you. This means that one may know you better than the other, while one still thinks that you play with hot wheels or Barbies when you’re now 16 years old. The biggest problem that you may run in to is repeat gifts. I can’t tell you how many times I have seen kids get the exact same thing from each parent and have to play it off like it was unique. It’s extremely hard to fake excitement when you get something for the third time.

So, all of you divorced kids, here’s to you. I understand you, I feel your pain and I am here for you. We’re all here for you. You may feel that no one understands your slightly negative outlook on the holidays, but rest assured that you are not alone. Your parents won’t understand. Your friends may not understand. But if you can make it through the holiday season this year, then you can show them all that we are the strongest type of children out there.

Signed,

One Of You

Cover Image Credit: Kayla Green

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14 Fraternity Guy Gifts Ideas, Since He Already Has Enough Beer

Frat boys are a species of their own and here are some exciting gifts they will be ecstatic to receive!

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What more do frat boys love than alcohol, partying, and just acting stupid? Here are some gifts that help fulfill all of those needs for the frat boy in your life!

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Whats better than one beer? Six beers! This fashionable camouflage accessory can be used for tailgates, beach days, formals and everything in between.

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2. Phone juul holder 

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3. Animal house poster 

This Animal House poster is a classic staple for any frat boy. This poster will compliment any frat house decor or lack thereof.

Price: $1.95

4. The American Fraternity book

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5. Beer pong socks 

These snazzy socks featuring beer pong will be loved by any frat boy. As for the way to any frat boy's heart may, in fact, be beer pong.

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6. Condom case

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7. Frat house candle

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8. "Frat" sticker

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9. Natty Light t-shirt 

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Please note that prices are accurate and items in stock as of the time of publication. As an Amazon Associate, Odyssey may earn a portion of qualifying sales.

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It's Only November, DO NOT Cue The Christmas Music

"Why are people so quick to switch gears from October 31... to November 1st?"

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As I write this article it is early November. Crazy how we are already into November. For those of you who have two different personalities from Halloween to November 1, this is for you. Do not cue Christmas music in early November.

November is a really beautiful month if you take the time to appreciate it. Leaves continue to change, the temperature starts to drop, which means more coffee and hot chocolate! The NJEA convention is in early November, if you're an educator, future one, or if you're a current student, you are off these days, and of course, everyone is off for Thanksgiving. A time to celebrate what we are thankful for with our friends and family. Tables full of hot soups to warm our chilly bodies, turkey, creamy mashed potatoes, stuffing, sweet cranberry sauce, an array of pies and desserts, you name it.

So why are people so quick to switch gears from October 31, a time to dress up, trick or treat and attend Halloween parties, to November 1st, a time that has become all about Black Friday and Christmas? We've lost the meaning of Thanksgiving. In my opinion, stores should not be open on Thanksgiving Day. As mentioned it's a day to spend with family. You can shop for those best deals and stand in line for hours the following day and days leading up to Christmas.

We live in a time where everyone is busy with their own lives and family, and it's difficult to get together with everyone's schedules. So on Thanksgiving, it's the perfect time to surround yourself with family and friends, enjoying a meal together, counting your blessings, showing gratitude and appreciation, and catching up on everyone's lives. Truly a day of Thanksgiving!

So I encourage all of you to prepare for Thanksgiving and focus on family, friends, and gratitude. Next time someone talks about Black Friday or Christmas before Thanksgiving, stand your ground, make your voice and the holiday of Thanksgiving be heard.

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