I find myself asking, "Did they really need to use that word?" or "Why do they think that word is okay?" frequently in classes. The R-word is nothing to play around with, and if you are still trying to figure out what the R-word is, it is the word retarded.
I almost always say something when I hear this word. Just hearing it makes me uncomfortable, to me it is like someone calling a black person the N-word, or a girl a slut. It is NOT OKAY. Recently, I found myself yet again confronting someone who said it during a conversation. This time though he didn't apologize, he just looked at me and said saying the word stupid is the same thing. Excuse me? No, it is not.
Here are a few definitions, the first two being from Dictionary.com, while the second two are from UrbanDictionary.com
1. Less advanced in mental, physical, or social development than is usual for one's age.
2. Very foolish or stupid.
3.It means "very stupid" but in a more hilarious, weird, and/or spontaneous way. From the Latin word for "slow."
4. The idiotic belief that some lives are worth less, mean less, learn less, comprehend less.
Did you notice that the words used in those definitions are words like "less than", "stupid", "weird"? Using this word needs to stop, we should never make ANYONE feel less than, stupid, or weird.
1. It hurts.
You never know who is listening to you, or around you during conversations. I am not just talking about people being around with an actual Intellectual Disability, I am talking about everyone. The lady next to you may have had a son die from being born with a birth defect. The guy in front of you may have been called that when he was younger because of his dyslexia. And what if I'm sitting next to you? My six year old, adorable, little brother is deaf, and there is nothing about him that should be described as the R-word.
2. What if it was you?
Are you struggling with ADD, or having trouble sitting at that dinner table because of your anxiety and everyone around you? What if someone came up to you, pointed out your disability in front of everyone, and proceeded to call you the R-word? Oh you don't like that? Think twice before you do it to someone else.
3. Are they really that different?
Oh, thats right--you're not thinking about the actual person you are hurting, you're just using the word in your conversation. I challenge you to have a conversation with my six year old brother, or to sit with his special needs pre-school class at his school. I promise you, you will fall in love with those children, and never want to hurt them.
4. It is just a silly word.
No, no it is not. It is derogatory, and hurtful. Would you put the N-word in your random conversation? No, then why the R-word?
5. Stupid or dumb is the same thing.
Yet again, no it is not. The R-word was used as a derogatory word to describe people with intellectual disabilities, or ones "different" than us.
But aren't we all different? And isn't that what makes us who we are? I think it would pretty boring if we were all the same.
