I look better with earrings.

And for fear of forgetting my

morning diamonds I

used to keep them in throughout the night.

And sometimes

all I used to feel was the pressure

of metal pressing into the back of my neck yet,

while I slept,

at least I looked pretty.

And perhaps that is why I hesitated

to push you away when

your teeth pressed against my neck

so hard like

cutting diamonds

I thought you might

draw blood.

You did always think I was pretty.

If I were reading this in front of you

I would never get past

stanza two without

your pleading eyes forcing me

to apologize for something

you did to me.

You blame me or

the moment,

the lack of light,

the energy the vibe you felt that night the drink

you poured for me.

I should not be so irresponsible.

It would not be the first time

you confused your knife of a tongue

for tough love,

and your hands for protection

while they smothered me.

When you tell girls their body is a temple

you do not mean it to

preserve and protect.

You mean it as if my body

is a place of worship built for you

to visit whenever

you need to feel grounded,

and maybe pushing me down

will keep your head on straight.

You can believe in God

and still, sin in His church.

But my love was never meant

to bring you peace.

I could have brought light

into your life like the rising sun,

but sadly that is a fire you

are never invited to feel.

Whatever it is you are seeking

I will not guide the way through your

woods of insecurity and hormonal rage.

My love is not fun sized for your convenience.

It will never fit into your pocket.

The way you tried to fit yourself in me

the way my earrings fit my ears

no longer.

It is blinding

and stronger

than you could ever imagine.

Certainly stronger than you.

I haven't worn earrings in months.

I just thought you should know.