Sitting here at my best friends' graduation is a lot like watching the finale for my favorite TV show. All of the highlights fly through my mind at a million miles an hour with a million colors. Suddenly all of the bad times don't seem so bad and the good times seem so good. It’s also much like a finale in the sense that things just didn’t turn out the way I thought they would or even thought they should. That’s life, though.
I'm just thinking, “It was worth it.” We all have those semesters that feel a lot like slow destruction and much less like actual education. Still, these people kept me sane. They also kept me from a lot of responsibility, but it kept me sane, nonetheless. They listened to me vent, and told me that I wasn’t crazy -- which we all know is a lie, but it was a nice sentiment.
I'm telling myself I'm not gonna cry. That wouldn't be rational. In 21st century America, it's so easy to catch up with people, it's almost ridiculous to cry about college ending or moving away--which are essentially the same thing. Still, I'm gonna sob. My feels cannot be restrained. They're a big sappy bucket waiting for the moment when they're going to tip.
Love defies logic. I don't mean romantic love, though that defies logic too--another rant for another day. I mean this crazy love and care for other people -- a connection that you don't want to risk breaking by distance or change. That's the scariest thing of all. Change brings uncertainty, and I'm not a fan. That’s where things didn’t turn out like I would have hoped. First of all, I would be hoping no one would be leaving. Even further, we end up closer to people we didn’t expect and further from those who we expect to get even closer to. I hoped for an easy, smooth transition, but people are dynamic. Things happen for a reason, and we love who we love and drift from those we drift from.
Still on this graduation day, I'm cheering for my friends -- both near and far, but my heart is full of sadness and pride that the people I love so much and for so long are moving on. They're really gonna do this adult thing, even though I'm staying behind. I'm hoping to put off the adulting for a bit longer.
Here's to my friends! May no one trip when they cross the stage. May you all land One Tree Hill scale jobs. May your laughter be much and tears be few--all in the right timing of course--laughter at the wrong time is a nightmare, trust me. May your milk stay fresh and your microwave clean. May you find sales on organic produce and have to eat microwaveable dinners as little as possible. May budgeting and self-control come easy and your bank accounts never run empty. In all seriousness, good luck guys. Our friendships are going to transcend reality and last forever. I believe it. Farewell college, hello other real world.
