Let me begin by a disclaimer – although the necessities of subjectivity oblige me to write this article through a feminine perspective, consider this essay gender blind with a terribly inadequate use of pronouns.
When was the last time you were complimented? I don’t mean empty words applicable to anyone. I’m talking about a compliment that could only have been addressed to you. The kind that makes you smile a first time when you hear it, and a second when you let it sink in. Words that resonate within you a week later while you’re walking down the street, attempting to catch the last few seconds on the green light, and still make you happy. Flattery can easily dissipate into trivialities, yet don’t we all know how to make our friends happy? How are we so quick to reassure them of our support on social media but so reluctant to spontaneously boost their confidence. Even when encountering strangers, why is it so complicated to tell them what we find unique about them, talk about their lovely quirk. Furthermore, why must we associate complimenting with intent. Must flirting or networking be the basis for moral uplifting?
Big cities can be so atrociously overwhelming. Loneliness can fill every corner of a crowded alley. Perhaps because we no longer seek to know people past the image they set up to protect themselves. Feelings and emotions are so easily played with, so why trust anyone with them, right? But wouldn’t you rather sit with someone who is able to pinpoint the characteristics they love about you, from your eloquence to your demeanor, than to be told you’re beautiful by a succession of strangers who might have already forgotten your name? Maybe it’s the Valentine’s Day emotionality that engendered all these questions, but I do believe that the short attention span developing with the constant flow of distraction affects human interactions to their core. Why waste words if they are not being heard? Make compliments wisely, and pay attention to those you receive. Confidence is so easily broken, because sometimes we hear and believe depreciation more than we do appreciation. I may even risk contradicting myself here, but fundamentally, why wait for the perfect compliment? Is it not enough to know yourself and remind yourself of your worth?
With the overload of photographs and short texts we receive daily, Valentine’s Day may be the perfect occasion to find the perfect compliment. Remind yourself why you spend time with those you chose to be with, and find the wonderful originality of every personality. Obliterate any loneliness with the memory of sweet words.
