There’s always been a negative stigma surrounding being by yourself. We’re sort of programmed to take pity when we see people in public eating by themselves or staying in on a Friday night instead of going out with a group of friends. Now I’m not saying that being the kind of person who likes to be surrounded by people is wrong – everyone is different. This is more-so a critique of the society we are brought up in that teaches us that being by yourself is wrong.
Personally, I like to know a lot of people because I feel more comfortable knowing who is around me, but I’ve always been the kind of person who keeps a few close friends and spends time with them. I like to surround myself with people I trust – people I can talk openly and freely with. If those people aren’t around, I am learning to be comfortable with being alone.
I think learning how to be alone is an essential part of growing up and becoming an adult. It’s sort of hard, especially in college to be comfortable staying in on a Friday night and not feel sorry for yourself because believe me, I’ve been there. As I get older though, I’m starting to be more and more comfortable with myself and this is a great feeling.
Learning to be alone is incredibly vital in learning who you are. Especially as a young adult, I’m learning that taking some time to yourself gives you a lot of perspective on certain situations and sometimes helps to make you see the bigger picture. You start to realize the important things in life and who is there for you and who isn’t. You also find a newfound respect for yourself because you learn to forgive and you learn to move on from the things you used to blame yourself for. More importantly, when you learn to be alone, you learn how to be better to those who share your time.
There is a sort of clarity that occurs when you take time to yourself. You learn why you did certain things and you start to learn and understand why people did certain things to you. You also start to learn the things – and people – you really shouldn’t pay attention to. You learn to embrace yourself, and this sense of independence leads you to be a more confident, mindful person in the long run.
