An Ode to New Year's Resolutions

It's that time of year.

Sarina Gersten

Dec 27, 2018

University of Connecticut

c1.staticflickr.com

It's the new year. Here's what goes through everyone's minds when the new year hits.

1) NEW YEAR!! NEW ME!!

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Wooooo!!! The motivation of the new year is in full swing. It is, obviously, the perfect time to COMPLETELY TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE.

2. I have kept my resolution going for a full day!

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I am amazing. Nothing can stop me. I am on freaking fire! I have kept up my resolution to eat healthy for a full 24 hours.

3. It has been a week!

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Oh yeah! I have been knitting every day for a week. Everyone who gives up on their resolutions are weak. I am strong. I have the mind of a champion. I will obviously conquer my goals.

4. I can have a cheat day.

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I have gone to the gym for a full week. I can take a day off. You know, it's not good to exercise for more than a week straight. I could get hurt. This cheat day is really to help myself get stronger...

5. This resolution was a lot harder than I thought.

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Who in their right mind has time to eat healthy and go to the gym every day? Losing 5 pounds be damned.

6. Why did I make this resolution?

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I know that I am incapable of saving $1000 each month. Why would I decide to never spend money on going out or shopping? You only live once, and now I'm boring. What is wrong with me?! Why would I make such a restricting resolution?

7. Since my resolution was dumb, I'm allowed to not completely follow it.

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Well no one can teach themselves to sew a quilt. I never actually wanted to do that. So I'm allowed to take a little break. I don't have to work on my project every day.

8. Actually, on second thought, I think I'm just going to be done with this resolution all together.

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No one roller skates in this day and age anyway. It's not really worth my time. Life gets in the way. I should just spend it watching Netflix and spending time with friends and family.

9. What do I do with all the things I bought to help me with my resolution?

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What do I do with all these cookbooks that I bought to learn how to cook? I no longer have any interest to learn how to cook. I'll just stick them at the bottom of my closet because maybe one day I will want to learn how to cook.

10. Well there's always next year.

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At this point, the end of January is approaching fast. I'll just wait until next year to run a marathon. Marathons are overrated anyway.

New year's resolutions are overrated anyway. Good luck in the new year!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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An Ode to New Year's Resolutions

It's that time of year.

1) NEW YEAR!! NEW ME!!

2. I have kept my resolution going for a full day!

3. It has been a week!

4. I can have a cheat day.

5. This resolution was a lot harder than I thought.

6. Why did I make this resolution?

7. Since my resolution was dumb, I'm allowed to not completely follow it.

8. Actually, on second thought, I think I'm just going to be done with this resolution all together.

9. What do I do with all the things I bought to help me with my resolution?

10. Well there's always next year.

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I never thought that I'd catch this Lovebug again

"I'm speechless, over the edge I'm just breathless I never thought that I'd catch this love bug again" - Lovebug

"I'll pick you up at seven we can drive around and jam to Sucker" -BB Good

"Got the news today... THE JONAS BROTHER ARE BACK." -A Little Bit Longer

"Got me on my toes" -Burnin' Up

"Jonas Brothers just turned the temperature hotter"- Burnin' Up

"Start screaming wake the neighbors, JoBros just dropped a new single" -World War III

"What did you do to my heart" -What Did I Do to Your Heart

"Can't have you" - Cant Have You

"Oh my gosh did you hear the Jonas Brothers new single, its sooo hot" - Video Girl

"Everybody live 'cause the future it now!" -Kids of the Future

"I just got back from the doctor, he told me that I had a problem, but I realized it just this new single"- Poison Ivy

"I've been to the year 2019, not much has changed but JoBros are reunited" -Year 3000

"Boy bands, and another one, and another one, and another one" -Year 3000

"Everyone knows it's meant to be, falling in love, just you and me" -Just Friends

"I know I'm better off alone everybody knows it's true" -Australia

"Where would we be, if we couldn't dream" -That's Just the Way We Roll

"You've got moves, I've got shoes, let's go dancing" -That's Just the Way We Roll

"Don't give up on love, have faith, restart" -Hold On

"All your hope is gone don't forget to hold on, hold on" -Hold on

"The night is calling and we're falling faster now" -Pushin' Me Away

"A call we never thought we'd get, but we got it"- S.O.S.

"I've been dancing on top of cars and stumbling out of bars" -Sucker

Are you at one of the ages mentioned in Taylor Swift's songs?

1. 3

2. 5

3. 7

4. 9

5. 13

6. 15

7. 16

8. 17

9. 19

10. 22

11. 25

12. 87

13. 89

Life is full of no's and it sucks, but sometimes you can change your perspective a get the most out of a rejection.

They're from both of his solo albums!

1. "treat people with kindness"

2. "such a pretty face, on a pretty neck"

3. "you're so golden"

4. "trying to remember what it feels like to have a heartbeat"

5. "my eyes want you more than a melody"

6. "you look pretty good down here"

7. "strawberry lipstick state of mind"

8. "comfortable silence is so overrated"

9. "she lives in daydreams with me"

10. "hard liquor mixed with a bit of intellect"

11. "i couldn't want you any more tonight"

12. "sweet creature"

13. "you've got my devotion"

14. "you flower, you feast"

15. "walk in your rainbow paradise"

16. "we're not who we used to be"

17. "loving you's the antidote"

18. "driving me crazy, but i'm into it"

19. "i miss the shape of your lips"

20. "even my phone misses your call"

21. "you sunshine, you temptress"

22. "tell me something just before you go"

23. "she's the first one that i see"

24. "same white shirt, couple more tattoos"

25. "don't you call him/her what you used to call me"

26. "breaking through the atmosphere"

27. "all the lights couldn't put out the dark"

28. "running with the thieves"

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