I am not a vegan… but I don’t want to hurt any more animals.
How on earth does that work, you ask? I have no idea… yet. I, like many others, love animals, but I love cheeseburgers too. I look at pictures of piglets and chicks and baby cows and think to myself, “I could never hurt such a sweet, innocent creature,” and yet, I went to out to dinner and ordered chicken fried rice without hesitation. So I am left stuck between being a "plant based human" or being a killer.
I grew up knowing that we needed to save the polar bears, and that we needed to protect the endangered species, but no one ever mentioned the five chickens in Wisconsin all cramped into one cage. No one told me about the dairy cow whose baby was taken away from her hours after birth. Everyone failed to mention what happens to the animals that become “meat.” It is easier for everyone to just agree to ignore it; to let someone else deal with it and go about our lives.
Personally, I know that killing an animal is wrong, but I can’t seem leave it at just that. There is always a “but” at the end of that sentence that I use to justify why I eat meat. But in reality, I know that killing an animal is wrong. Period.
The sad truth is that factory farming is murder that is totally legal and totally normal in our society. That fact alone leaves me feeling entirely helpless. A problem this huge and widespread is not something that one person can fix. Why should bother even trying to help when nothing is going to make a difference?
But is it better to let horrible things happen than it is to barely make difference trying to change them?
No one, including myself, wants to believe they are a bad person. So, we build walls of excuses to protect us from the reality of what we’re really doing when we buy meat at grocery stores. In order for me, and anyone else in my situation, to change, we need to break down those walls one excuse at a time.
I have to stop looking at the big picture and start looking in the mirror. I am not going to change the world, I am going to change my habits. I am going to take it one meal at a time and do my best to resolve the moral dissonance that has been haunting me.
I am going to start with no meat one day a week and go from there. It’s not a huge step, but its something that I can handle.
I am not a vegan, but I am going try.
