To The Girl Who Is Not In A Rush To Get Married

To The Girl Who Is Not In A Rush To Get Married

Marriage, who?

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Marriage. The well-known end goal that comes with every happily ever after. I can understand the pressure we feel to put a ring on it after dating someone for a such a long time. But what I can't understand is how someone in their early 20s can feel ready for marriage. That is a commitment that someone at 21-years-old should not have to make.

Ever since we were young, we've grown familiar with the significance of marriage. Not only from our mom and dad but back in the day when people would tie the knot at 18. Many of these people were our grandparents who are still living a happy life together, but times have changed. In those days, opportunities for women were way more limited than they are today, so a woman's life goal was to be a good wife and have children.

I am by no means saying that if you are married, you cannot fulfill your goals as a woman. However, women today have so many new opportunities and chances that don't necessarily entail the need to be a wife.

Being in a lasting, steady relationship has made me think about marriage. Although the idea of marriage has probably crossed my mind differently than it may have for others. My boyfriend and I are absolutely not ready for marriage. It's not that we aren't happy or love each other, we're actually the greatest we've ever been. We're just not at that point in our lives, and in no rush at all to tie the knot.

I find comfort in having time for myself and I learned that I actually need that space. I'm still young and there's still so much I want to explore and do before settling down and having to come home to a husband every night.

I have my own life with little quirks and rituals I do daily that I don't want to be disturbed just yet.

Call me selfish, but my responsibilities are only to myself, and right now that's just the way I like it. I know that there are a lot of couples who are very much in love and want to get married that have probably never been more sure about anything. And if that's the case then go forth. What doesn't work for me could just be your cup of tea.

All I know is that marriage is not something you can go back on just because you changed your mind or aren't happy anymore. It's a covenant made by two people through the good, bad, and ugly. For this reason, you need to make sure you're stable and ready.

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An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
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Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

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There's Nothing Wrong With Meeting The Love Of Your Life On A Dating Site

In such a tech-savvy world, why are we so afraid to admit that we found love online?

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Growing up watching rom-coms like "When Harry Met Sally" and "Notting Hill," I've always been a bit of a romantic. I can't count the number of times I've constructed in my mind a completely unrealistic meet-cute where I would find the love of my life. I mean, who doesn't want their own fairy tale romance?

But in this age of social media and dating apps, the chances of accidentally bumping into your soulmate is slim to none. Dating apps like Bumble and Tinder are becoming ever so popular, with more and more individuals meeting their significant other online. So why is it that in such a tech-savvy society, people are still afraid to admit that they found love online?

I blame romantic comedies. Even though many romantic comedies are focused on being "realistic," the chances of me meeting the LOML at a carnival when he decides to climb up the Ferris wheel to talk to me (*cough* "The Notebook" *cough*) are highly unlikely. We've become so fixated on the idea of this perfect relationship that it becomes almost inferior to meet someone through a dating app.

But it's time the stigma ended. Who cares where you met your significant other? Sure, maybe you originally swiped right on Tinder with the sole intention of hooking up, but life happens.

It shouldn't matter that you didn't meet in some crazy, over-the-top fashion.

And sure, there's nothing wrong in hoping for a romantic comedy worthy meet-cute, but you shouldn't let modern cinema dictate your relationship. There's no shame in saying that you met your boyfriend or girlfriend on a dating app. I mean, what are these apps meant for? Meeting online doesn't in any way take away from the legitimacy of one's relationship. So instead of focusing on these so-called perfect moments, let's focus on building perfect relationships because life isn't always a movie.

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