Social media is constantly changing. There are new memes to discover, new pop culture references to catch and new tweets to write. Every day seems like a new discovery in the realm of social media. I love checking my Twitter feed and my Facebook timeline. I love seeing my friends and their selfies lining up all of my social media feeds. I love social media, but there are things about it that I do find toxic. Sometimes the things we see on social media aren't what they seem.
I hate the term 'relationship goals'. The posts that have #relationshipgoals make me cringe. The pictures of guys stuffing balloons in his girlfriend's bedroom for her birthday along with roses and gifts drives me crazy.
The relationship goals trend has become toxic for relationships. You shouldn't place your worth on whether your significant other drops money on you or not. Instead of looking for validation with gifts, search for ways to validate each other with words. Encourage your significant other if they do something great. Give them words of support when their day isn't going well. Lean on each other when things are rough.
Gifts are nice and shiny, but a million balloons aren't going to hug you after a long day at school or work. Roses are beautiful, but they wilt after a few days in a vase. Material gifts are nice to receive on birthdays or holidays, but they aren't what truly make a relationship.
Social media has completely skewed what relationships look like. Instead of romanticizing the idea of holding hands down the hallway, social media is romanticizing the idea of spending money on other people. Relationships are now being put on a strain because social media has made an image of what relationships should look like. This makes expectations go up so much higher than they were already.
Relationships shouldn't be validated by surprise flowers every Tuesday or Taco Bell runs every single day. You can show your significant other that you love them through little everyday things. Communicate with each other and build each other up. Make each other smile with cheesy jokes and stories about your day. There are so many other ways to make a relationship work that don't involve spending ridiculous amounts of money.
Let's go back to romanticizing handwritten notes, lingering glances, and holding hands. Be with someone who appreciates your intelligence and your integrity. Find someone who shows that appreciation with not only words but their actions. Don't find the need to compare your relationship to the images you see on Twitter or Facebook. Relationships aren't meant to be glitzy and picture-perfect. It's about loving another human being and their imperfections. It's messy and wonderful all at the same time. That is the true relationship goal to work towards.
