As someone who has lived in North Dakota my whole entire life, I was definitely not made for the winters. You can bet that the tears start flowing as soon as I see the first snowflakes. I swear, I look like a Floridian visitor by how much I complain about the cold.

I’m cranky. I’m cold. And I should not be associated with. For at least three months, my mind is constantly filled with these 18 torturous thoughts.

1. "Did it really snow again?!"

Not. Again. Oh please God, not again.

2. "WHYYYY"

Do I really have to go outside today?!?! Nope, not today Satan.

3. "Who even invented winter?"

Cause I'd like to politely tell you to f--- off.

4. "Why do I live here?"

How many times am I going to ask myself this before I actually do something about it?

5. "I was NOT made for this kind of weather."

No, it really doesn't matter if I've lived here my whole life and grew up in this weather - I was NOT made for this.

6. I'd rather just lie here and die of hypothermia than have to deal with this wind chill."

My legs are so frozen that I can't even take another step. I'll fall down on ice and be too stiff to get back up.

7. "What's the point of even having a vehicle if it isn't going to start in this weather?"

Of course, when we need it the most, it fails. Who wants to sell me a prototype for a winter-proof car?

8. "I. Need. To. Move."

Like NOW.

9. "Why am I still here?!"

Why do I do this to myself? Why do I keep myself here? Why, Mother Nature?! WHY?!

10. "If that groundhog calls for six more weeks of winter, I'm firing him."

But, of course, he will. Of course.

11."This. is. bullshit."

Complete and utter bullshit.

12. "I wanna be where it is 90°.”

I won't complain about it ever being too hot if I never have to deal with this weather again.

13. "This weather hurts my face, and I don't like it."

My face hurts. My legs hurt. My fingers hurt. My whole body hurts. I'm numb, and I can't feel anything.

14. "It's SO COLD OUT!!!"

It could be 40°, and it would still be too cold for me.

15."This is not fair. This is honestly torture."

Out of all the places, I got stuck in this frickin' tundra. Not fair.

16. "32°? More like -43°"

Why does the weatherman always try to fool us? Yeah, maybe it's actually 32°, but you could at least warn me about this gosh darn windchill.

17. "I am done. I am done with this."

I'm going to curl up under my 30 blankets and never come out. Never.

18. "Call me when winter is over. I'll be hibernating!"

Better yet, call me when it's at least 75°.

If I had to choose between never dealing with another winter again and jumping in a pool of sharks, I wouldn’t think twice about jumping in. I am a loud and proud, born and raised, North Dakotan who hates these trademark North Dakota winters.