Repeat After Me: Nobody Cares That You're Not A Feminist

Repeat After Me: Nobody Cares That You're Not A Feminist

Really, no one.


Feminism is one of those topics that people tend to deem "controversial" as if fighting for equality across the globe is truly something that should be considered a dispute. It's obviously controversial with men, who refuse to accept and acknowledge the amount of privilege that has allowed them to dominate the world; they want the credit for it, they just won't admit that it caused women a lot of pain in order for them to get there.

And though in theory, it shouldn't be, feminism is controversial with women, too. These are the same people that think privilege is a dirty word. Or that acknowledging any sort of inequality somehow makes you sensitive or weak, synonymous with a "liberal."

The unwillingness to educate oneself about intersectional feminism and the disdain for those who have is often boasted about as it's some kind of personality trait. You don't have to be an activist or a feminist by any means but hating on women who are true doesn't do a thing besides revealing your internalized misogyny. The worst part is that many of the critiques from women who claim feminism is useless are based on misconceptions of what modern-day feminism really is. You see a photo of a woman protesting with her breasts out and assume that that's all that feminists do. Radical versions and extremes are the majority of what goes viral/what more people see so it's not best to make assumptions based on that.

Another claim against feminism that's rampant is the idea that just because one woman feels she doesn't "need" it, then neither does anybody else. Not only is this entirely egocentric but it is also ridden with privilege. Just because you and I aren't living in fear of things like a drastic difference in your pay or even worse — honor killings or female genital mutilation — does not mean that other people aren't. We have the ability to use our privilege to raise awareness for these issues. You may not want to but it's completely backward to hate on people who do.

An additional criticism is the idea that:

1. there are only two genders and

2. men and women are biologically different so equality is unattainable.

First of all, scientifically, sex and gender are two different things. Sex is biological while gender is socially and culturally constructed. Gender is a spectrum. Secondly, yes, men and women are different (duh) but that does not warrant inequality that constantly sets women back. You don't have to be a feminist but at least know the facts.

So no, nobody really cares that you're not a feminist and it's definitely not something to shout from the rooftops about. Hating on your own misperceptions of feminism doesn't make you different or cool or unique.

It's not going to change anything but feminism will. Because guess what? We're still fighting for your equality over here.

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I Am A Female And I Am So Over Feminists

I believe that I am a strong woman, but I also believe in a strong man.

Beliefs are beliefs, and everyone is entitled to their opinion. I'm all about girl power, but in today's world, it's getting shoved down our throats. Relax feminists, we're OK.

My inspiration actually came from a man (God forbid, a man has ideas these days). One afternoon my boyfriend was telling me about a discussion his class had regarding female sports and how TV stations air fewer female competitions than that of males. In a room where he and his other male classmate were completely outnumbered, he didn't have much say in the discussion.

Apparently, it was getting pretty heated in the room, and the women in the class were going on and on about how society is unfair to women in this aspect and that respect for the female population is shrinking relative to the male population.

If we're being frank here, it's a load of bull.

SEE ALSO: To The Women Who Hate Feminism

First of all, this is the 21st century. Women have never been more respected. Women have more rights in the United States than ever before. As far as sports go, TV stations are going to air the sports that get the most ratings. On a realistic level, how many women are turning on Sports Center in the middle of the day? Not enough for TV stations to make money. It's a business, not a boycott against female athletics.

Whatever happened to chivalry? Why is it so “old fashioned" to allow a man to do the dirty work or pay for meals? Feminists claim that this is a sign of disrespect, yet when a man offers to pick up the check or help fix a flat tire (aka being a gentleman), they become offended. It seems like a bit of a double standard to me. There is a distinct divide between both the mental and physical makeup of a male and female body. There is a reason for this. We are not equals. The male is made of more muscle mass, and the woman has a more efficient brain (I mean, I think that's pretty freaking awesome).

The male body is meant to endure more physical while the female is more delicate. So, quite frankly, at a certain point in life, there need to be restrictions on integrating the two. For example, during that same class discussion that I mentioned before, one of the young ladies in the room complained about how the NFL doesn't have female athletes. I mean, really? Can you imagine being tackled by a 220-pound linebacker? Of course not. Our bodies are different. It's not “inequality," it's just science.

And while I can understand the concern in regard to money and women making statistically less than men do, let's consider some historical facts. If we think about it, women branching out into the workforce is still relatively new in terms of history. Up until about the '80s or so, many women didn't work as much as they do now (no disrespect to the women that did work to provide for themselves and their families — you go ladies!). We are still climbing the charts in 2016.

Though there is still considered to be a glass ceiling for the working female, it's being shattered by the perseverance and strong mentality of women everywhere. So, let's stop blaming men and society for how we continue to “struggle" and praise the female gender for working hard to make a mark in today's workforce. We're doing a kick-ass job, let's stop the complaining.

I consider myself to be a very strong and independent female. But that doesn't mean that I feel the need to put down the opposite gender for every problem I endure. Not everything is a man's fault. Let's be realistic ladies, just as much as they are boneheads from time to time, we have the tendency to be a real pain in the tush.

It's a lot of give and take. We don't have to pretend we don't need our men every once in a while. It's OK to be vulnerable. Men and women are meant to complement one another—not to be equal or to over-power. The genders are meant to balance each other out. There's nothing wrong with it.

I am all for being a proud woman and having confidence in what I say and do. I believe in myself as a powerful female and human being. However, I don't believe that being a female entitles me to put down men and claim to be the “dominant" gender. There is no “dominant" gender. There's just men and women. Women and men. We coincide with each other, that's that. Time to embrace it.

Cover Image Credit: chrisjohnbeckett / Flickr

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If Gillette's Ad About Toxic Masculinity Offends You, Then You Are A Toxic Male With Something To Hide

I never want to hear "boys will be boys" ever again.


A new Gillette ad titled "We Believe: The Best Men Can Be" has been taking the internet by storm because apparently, it is controversial to say that men should want to constantly improve themselves and become better people. The ad touches on how men should hold each other accountable to prevent issues like sexual assault, mansplaining, and bullying. Men too often shrug their shoulders and allow their male family, friends, colleagues and so on to be violent and sexist because "boys will be boys." This phrase is repeated multiple times in the ad as a way to emphasize how ridiculous it truly sounds because toxic masculinity should not be accepted. Boys should be taught how to be compassionate and respectful, not abusive.

These all sound like wonderful things to be broadcasting to the public, right? No one would say it is offensive to tell men to do better...right? Unfortunately, this is not the case. The majority of the men that have watched the Gillette ad refuse to believe that toxic masculinity is real and believe instead that the ad is promoting "toxic liberalism."

The overwhelming response to the ad has been that Gillette is trying to shame men for being strong and that they should instead make themselves weak and docile. These men are only proving how real toxic masculinity is because instead of reflecting on how their own actions could be oppressing women and putting them in danger, they dig their heels in and refuse to stop being "real men." If being a real man means having no regard for anyone but yourself and using brute force to overpower others, then you should not want to be a real man in the first place. Toxic masculinity is instilled in men from the moment they are born and I think it is amazing that Gillette is trying to show men how much of a difference they can make by teaching their sons that they are not entitled to women's bodies and that there is nothing wrong with being sensitive.

The real reason why so many men are getting defensive after watching this ad is that they know that they contribute to toxic masculinity but they do not care because it would require them to put forth the effort to unlearn their entitlement. They want to be able to comfortably continue taking advantage of women and expressing themselves through unhealthy aggression. It should concern everyone that there are hundreds of thousands of men furious at an ad for telling them to hold each other accountable. How is it offensive to be told to stand up for women's rights? How is it offensive to be told to communicate without violence? These are all positive actions, yet men are acting as if Gillette told them to cut off their hands and feet for the sake of feminism.

I have seen men claiming that they were offended by Gillette's ad because it labels every single man as a rapist. Listen closely, because this has already been repeated many times by many individuals: if you are not a rapist, then you should not feel targeted. The reality is that there are a significant amount of men that rape women and this issue is not going to be ignored in order to spare the feelings of the men that are not rapists. Frankly, if you feel that upset over awareness being brought to the fact that toxic masculinity makes men feel justified in raping women, then you are most likely a toxic male that has raped a woman. You have a guilty conscience and you want the topic to be avoided so you do not have to face the repercussions of your actions.

I do not want to hear the "not all men" argument come out of the mouth of a single person ever again. We all know not all men are rapists, but there are too many of you that are. Fighting back against toxic masculinity and demanding accountability from men is a good start for making the world a safer place for everyone and I am glad that Gillette decided to use their platform to spread this message.

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