It starts out as any other night out would. You get ready in your bathroom, half-naked, with music blaring and your hairbrush is often repurposed as a microphone. If you’re planning on pregaming the pregame, you probably already have a glass (or bottle) of wine sitting on your bathroom counter that you sip on after you curl a couple strands of hair.
You finish getting ready and find the perfect outfit after you’ve thrown your entire closet across your room. You ask your roommates 20 times if they’re sure you look hot enough, and once they tell you yes every, single, time, you decide they’re right and off you go to your pregame.
Once you arrive, you’re already feeling pretty drunk. You walk in and by the greeting you get, you can tell everyone else is about as drunk as you are. That’s when you know it’s going to be a good night. You see the beer pong table and it’s the first place you head. Heels make you taller, and that makes beer pong easier, right? You are actually playing pretty decent, and every time you make a cup, you feel like you’re on top of the world!
Once you’re done running the beer pong table, you decide to just hang out and drink until it’s time to go downtown. Before you know it, it’s already gotten late and taxis have been called.
You get downtown and of course, you have to hangout in Chops since it’s still early. You grab a booth and maybe a shot tower and chat with your friends as you continue to get hammered.
Time keeps flying by. It’s gotten pretty late, so you and your friends decide to head on over to good ole’ Cap Sh*tty, I mean Capital City. By the time you make it in the door, you’re wasted. You see some of your friends and run over to say hey because you haven’t seen them since like yesterday!
Then it’s time to dance. You grab your friends and make your way onto the dance floor. What’s better than a bar full of wasted white girls trying to twerk?
You run into your old friend the fedora guy, who’s name you can’t quite remember, but of course, you have to take a Snapchat with him…and everyone else in the bar!
The night has somehow come to an end, and you manage to start walking home until you pass Barbs, and obviously, nothing is better than queso when you’re drunk. You wait in that dreaded long line, but when you see and smell that beautiful melted cheese, you know it was well worth the wait.
You make it back out the door and start to dread the walk home. Then you remember your saving grace, Snap! How could you forget about them?!?
You finally make it home, safe and sound. You get in your bed and pass out as soon as your head hits the pillow.
The next morning you wake up and start thinking about some of last night’s events and you feel like you’ve been run over by one of the GC shuttles a few times.
You finally find enough courage to go through your phone and see what kind of crazy texts you sent out or what you put on your snapchat story.
You decide that maybe it’s better you stay home on the weekend from now on…until next weekend rolls around.
Congrats Millyvegas, you have won once again.
