2016 has been a year of change and lessons learned. I learned most of these lessons the hard way, but I’m thankful that I learned them. Here are some lessons that I thought you should be armed with as you enter 2017 and the uncertainty that comes with a new year.
1. Life kicks you in the ass and you might need help getting back up.
2016 has been somewhat of a nightmare for most people, or so it seems. We lost some of the most incredible icons and Trump won the presidential election, causing the future to look very bleak and frightening for most people. There were so many other international crises and devastating news, not to mention the struggles that people faced on an individual level. All of this heartache and hardship has taught me that life can be ruthless; once you think you’re finally recovering from one attack, another one comes out of nowhere. I’ve realized that, when this happens and you feel completely beaten down, there is no shame in asking for help. Asking the people around you to lend a hand, whether it be a shoulder to cry on or something tangible, can be the difference between survival or total defeat. You can’t avoid the obstacles that life throws at you, but you can ask others for guidance.
2. Other people’s problems aren’t yours to solve.
This lesson has been a long time coming for me. Codependency-when your mood and identity are dependent on another person, and you may feel responsible for another’s mood. I’ve always felt responsible for other people’s happiness, but I just recently learned that it’s not uncommon and there’s actually a word for it. My loved ones have experienced some devastating events this past year and at first, I shouldered the weight of it all. I felt like I needed to fix everything, or at the very least, I needed to make them happy again. It wore me down and I just couldn’t do it anymore. But, I eventually learned that I can’t control other people and their emotions; I can only control myself. Of course I still worry about my friends and family, and I’ll always try to help them, but I no longer expect myself to be their savior. I’m the only one that can save me, and this remains true for everyone else, as well.
3. Everything eventually ends, but life always goes on.
This year, maybe something ended and it filled you with feelings of happiness and relief, like college. Maybe that part of your life came to end and you were happy to see it end. On the other hand, maybe a relationship ended and it filled you with heartache and grief. Regardless of how these endings made you feel, they happened. Everyone has experienced certain things coming to a close throughout the year; it’s inevitable. But, the world didn’t stop spinning and your life didn’t come to a crashing halt, even if you might have wanted it to. I learned the harsh truth that everything ends, even those things that you thought were forever. I also learned that you get through it. Something new comes along, you change course, and your keep going.
As with everything else, 2016 is coming to a close and a new year is starting. In this case, the end of 2016 brings me nothing but joy and relief. The new year will bring new experiences and new lessons, just like 2016. I can’t say that I’m 100% ready to face the new year, but it’s coming and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. So, I will use the experiences and lessons that I acquired this past year as I journey into 2017, and I hope that you will do the same.
