Never again, again.
Once more I'll let you back in
I know how the story ends
But I can't help myself
You'll break my heart I know
Through my tears I watch you go
Then just like it's always been
I'll say never again, again"
-Never Again, Again by Lee Ann Womack-
When you're raised to "forgive and forget", you tend to make the same mistakes over and over. Now while I still believe in finding the best in all people and giving them second, third, fourth... chances, I also have learned that sometimes you need to move forward with your life and leave those who are holding you back behind. My dear friend Anna wrote an article that really hit home for me, Walk Away From People Who Threaten Your Piece of Mind. My sanity, my happiness, and my health need to be my top priority. Some people may see this as selfish, but it isn't. If we constantly let ourselves fall into the same circle of lies and broken promises from those we keep letting back in, it's our own fault for not moving on.
Being forgiving is necessary, but being naïve is just unnecessary. Once you have been let down by the same person on multiple occasions, there comes a time where you need to protect yourself. Move forward and leave them behind. You have goals, dreams, ambitions and plans to focus on and that person is like a set of handcuffs holding you back. But guess what, you hold the key. Free yourself from your own misery. Your sanity and your happiness is all that matters for now.
“Letting go gives us freedom, and freedom is the only condition for happiness.” –Thich Nhat Hanh
THIS IS WHERE I STOPPED.
AS GOOD AS THAT SOUNDS, IT'S BULLSHIT (excuse the language). ALL I'M DOING IS MAKING AN EXCUSE FOR NOT TRYING HARD ENOUGH. LOVE EVERYONE. REGARDLESS OF WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO YOU. REGARDLESS OF THEIR VALUES/MORALS/BELIEFS. LOVE EVERYONE WHETHER THEY DESERVE IT OR NOT.
It's not our right to judge them. It's not our right to choose that they are NOT GOOD ENOUGH to be our friend. It's so easy to justify moving on without them, but it's not OK. We don't know everything going on in their life and it doesn't give us the right to come to quick conclusions. RELATIONSHIPS ARE HARD, and it takes work to maintain them. Remember that each of us sees things differently. We all have different perceptions on life and all of its' events. We're all unique, meaning we think, act, hear, feel, etc... different than others around us. FORGIVING IS NECESSARY whether we think we're in the right and they're wrong. YOU'RE GOING TO GET HURT in the process because people can be cruel, but you will survive and get stronger. Loving people is becoming so uncommon that people find it strange and they don't know how to handle it. Find a way to "be the bigger person" and show the people that have disappointed you something they'd never expect love. Yes, it sounds cheesy and awful and the LAST THING ON MY WISHLIST, but I've learned that even though hating people is much easier, it still doesn't make me happy.
IF YOU DON'T THINK THEY DESERVE IT, YOU PROBABLY DON'T EITHER.
LOVE EVERYONE.
John 13:34-35
"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
