Space is absolutely necessary for any relationship. In fact, a healthy relationship should consist of some me time. It gives you time to breathe on your grow and understand yourself. It's the time you can do what you enjoy without worrying about your partner. It's your time just to relax and embrace yourself. Space is a wonderful thing, for sure.
But sometimes, you get in a fight with your significant other, and then you require some space just to think and calm down. Now, there is nothing with that either. There are two things that most likely happen to couples after they fight. Either they yell at each other right away, and thoughts are just all over the place. Sometimes you think you're done explaining or yelling, but then you always seem to remember more. But at other times, you both vent it out, and it works out right away. Or they take a little time away from each other, think it through, and come back to resolve the fight. These two are the most common situations after fights. They both have their pros and cons. The first one's pros and cons are kind of obvious and already stated. It could work both ways, just depending on the two people.
However, giving each other space is a bit complicated, and it requires a mutual understanding of both people. First, taking some space from one another and thinking it through calmly about the situation can lead to better results. Since you will be calm, you will have a better choice of words for sure and will be able to analyze your feelings better since there won't things said or done in the heat of the moment.
Also, taking a step back will allow you to see the bigger picture and find any internal or external issues that caused the fight and brought other feelings into the current situation. And, of course, when you speak to one another, your thoughts will be put together so they will be organized and will make a lot more sense when they are spoken out loud. The benefits of taking a step back and thinking after a fight, instead of jumping in right away are great and, in my opinion, definitely persuasive enough.
As great as space sounds, there are drawbacks and things to keep in mind.
Remember, love is like a drug. If you don't receive it, you will eventually wean off of it.
As sad as that is, it's true. Relationships start off with attention that gradually expands to attraction and ultimately lead to love. When a couple gives each other space, that attention is obviously not there. That's why they say that a break will most likely lead to a break-up. Hence, there is a fine line between space and a break, and that is sometimes hard to draw because different people require different amounts of time for space and a break.
Thus, space also becomes hard when one person prefers or requires a lot more time than the other. And, the right thing to do is respect your partner's need for space, so you cannot and should not force them just to talk it out when you're ready. You both have to ready to talk things out. And, that can be hard because you certainly miss them and have to find ways to distract yourself. The scariest thing with this that you don't know when the distractions will result in you actually not thinking about the person and getting used to not getting the attention and love. It's a really terrifying feeling. Obviously, that intent was never there, but we do not control our feelings.
A recommendation for giving each other space is to set a time limit. Say that we will give each other three days or whatever works for both of you and then come back to discuss what you thought about. Writing or jotting down your thoughts may help the process go faster. Also, even though you may not be talking, you can agree to give each other updates on how you feel and where you stand personally. After all, communication is the key to a long-lasting relationship. Don't let that space turn into a break and eventually to break up. Gather up those thoughts and talk it out as soon as you can.
