October 11 was National Coming Out Day. It's a day for people in the LGBTQIA community to celebrate themselves, support others struggling with coming out, or publicly come out for the first time.
As an ally, it warmed my heart to see people reflect on their experience or even come out for the first time and see the comment section flood with love and support from all of their friends and family. It also hurt to read the experiences of so many.
Too many people struggled to come to terms with their sexuality or identity. Too many people had issues with friends and family. Too many people fought wars with themselves before finding the love and support that all people deserve.
That is not okay.
No one should ever feel the need to hide and suppress a part of who they are. No one should ever be afraid that they will lose those closest to them if they are true to who they really are. No one should ever have to struggle with their identity the way so many people unfortunately have.
I understand that this day to come out is a huge deal for some people. I understand that it can be a time for a weight to be lifted off their shoulders. I just wish that weight was never there in the first place.
Growing up, I never had to hide who I liked. I could tell my mom about the cute boy in my geometry class because everyone expected me to like a boy. What I don't understand is why can't people of all sexualities have that experience without having to "come out"?
Now, maybe it's my straight privilege. There are tons of issues that I will never even understand because I identify as a woman and I am attracted to men. But I really want to live in a world where I can talk to someone who is gay or a lesbian or bisexual or any other identity and they feel like they can talk about their lives as if it were as normal as my life because guess what? It is.
If I don't have to preface my comments about the opposite sex with "I'm straight," why do people of other sexualities have to let people know? Why can't we just accept people for who they are and not react to them like they are different?
I'm not trying to say that coming out day is unnecessary. Right now, it is. We need to talk about people's experiences and we need to celebrate those who come out to help further normalize something that is totally normal. And I know we are working towards a world where coming out won't need to be a huge ordeal anymore, because it will be completely socially acceptable. And I know one day we'll look back on these times and think, "What the HELL were we thinking?" I just wish we would get there sooner.
Because really, a person's sexuality affects that person and whatever partners that person chooses. It has no affect on me if the person next to me is gay or a lesbian or bisexual or transgender. That person is just that — a person. Therefore, that person deserves to be accepted in the exact same way I am accepted.
To anyone struggling to accept themselves, I am sincerely sorry for anything that has made you feel like you cannot be who you are. You deserve better than that.
