At one point or another, we have all been guilty of at least being a bit narcissistic. Whether it be jokingly with friends or in a more serious tone, narcissism is a largely neglected topic of discussion in everyday life when ego or self-esteem are in question. Here are some different takes about narcissism that can be explored.
The beginning question to get us all on the same page: What is narcissism? By definition narcissism is an excessive or erotic interest in oneself and one's physical appearance. This leads us to a couple different places where narcissism is most commonly used.
Using narcissism while with friends is normally said in a joking manner. Even though it may be posed as a joke, everything you say is usually said for a reason. Narcissism is sometimes used in the form of verbal bate about oneself. If someone is insecure about an aspect of themselves, they may make a narcissistic joke about that aspect only to seek reassurance from another person. For example, let's say one person is embarrassed about the fact that they are overweight. They may make a statement in a conversation jokingly that they are as slim and beautiful as a Victoria Secret model (beauty is within the eye of the beholder I am aware) with a tag of a "right?" on the end. The friend usually plays along in the joke and reciprocates with joking reassurance. Although this whole scenario has been a joke, the first friend still came away with an ego boost/self-esteem boost. Whether someone actually needs the boost is the question. Those who obviously don't need the boost are known as hot stuff while the others are secretly in need of legitimate self-esteem boosting action.
Narcissism can also be taken to unhealthy extremes that will eventually drive people away from you. In a normal conversation, the natural flow of subject matter goes from one person's life to the others in an exchange of information. If all someone does is talk about how great they are, people are less likely to be engaged in the conversation. This is a great thing to practice if you have trouble keeping friends or listening when others are talking. Take time to put others over yourself in a conversation and you'll be surprised at how much you can learn.
Overall narcissism isn't all bad, but it certainly has its place where it belongs. For those that have trouble with where it belongs, by practicing focusing your attention on others you will learn where it belongs and where it does not. Hopefully some introspection on your habits can lead to a happier you!
