We all have someone that we love, or used to love, or love to hate. Regardless there is someone in your life that you probably love in some way, shape or form dearly. Most likely, if you're like any basic human, you use sweet nicknames such as babe, sweetie, darling and so on. What's the fun in using the same old nicknames as anyone else? Nothing.
That is why I have compiled a list of the worst nicknames you could call a loved one. You should try one of these at least once to get a reaction.
1. Onion
It's that way of telling that special someone, "Hey I love you, but you stink." It also is a way of saying, "you're not basic, you have a lot of layers." Translation: You might be an ogre. The use of this nickname will be a surefire conversation starter in ANY relationship.
2. Caca
Yup, Spanish for poo. If you can't speak Spanish well, little poop will suffice. This endearing term is sure to sound authentic and fun. Surely you wouldn't be silly enough to tell them the translation or else you might get a reaction like this.
3. Egg
Call someone who is being silly an egghead, but someone you love an egg. Simple as that, 2+2 = four and egghead-head= endearing nickname. By calling someone an egg it's like saying "hey you're in households everywhere so it's easy to find you. I'll make sure not to drop you, because it'll be a big stinky mess." Adorable.
4. Lil Dicky
Enough said. Moving on.
5. Hot Dog
You might be saying, "Now hold on partner, hot dog can be a nickname," and yes you may be right and don't ever call me partner again. Do you know what you're really saying though?! Calling a loved one a hot dog is like saying "Hey you remind me of a bunch of really disgusting and crappy things mushed together to form one kind of decent thing." If that isn't the sweetest thing you've ever heard, you're lying. So take a moment out of your day and call a loved one a hot dog and don't leave them feeling like this...
6. Toot
A simple way of saying, "I can get used to the way you smell after a while. An open window might help though."
7. Tomato
Use this nickname to compliment a loved one during a time of need. Like in the event of a sunburn. It's also a way of letting a loved one know that they're ripe and seedy.
8. Pinhead
That gif is the only reason this is on the list and the only reaction you'll get to using this name.
9. Mommy/Daddy
Ya know, cause Oedipus was a great story growing up. Seriously, I understand some couples actually use this name...AND IT'S DISGUSTING. It's like, "oh yes, let me call this person I'm in love with the title of the person that brought me into this world." Fantastic.
10. Carrot
"You're awkwardly shaped, you're my least favorite color, and you taste funny. Yup, you're a carrot, but you help me see things clearer so I guess I'll keep you around."
11. Cheese
If you don't get this you are either too old or too young. #FostersHome Regardless Cheese is a wonderfully terrible name to call a loved one. It's like saying, "You go great with a lot, but you give me the cacas sometimes and it upsets my stomach. Also you stink... a lot."
12. Toe Head
Another one of those perfect conversation starter names! Yea, I know this is a common nickname for little blonde babies, but why can't that same horrible nickname be spread to a loved one! Sure to get a reaction and a conversation going. Also, you're welcome for the nightmares, I mean the picture.
So regardless of how long or strong your relationship is currently, you should definitely never use these nicknames if you enjoy your relationship. Well, maybe just once for fun and maybe twice if you're dating a really rad person that gets it. Regardless, the one reaction you'll never get using these nicknames is.
