An Open Letter To My Past Self

Dear Past Me,

First off, those red glasses that you thought were so cute when you were twelve? How could you do that to us? Red glasses, really? You couldn't have just gone with black? I know that you wanted to be unique, but we were stuck with those glasses for years. Honestly, I wonder if I should blame you, or our mom who let us walk out of the store with them.

But at least you stuck to yourself. I'll give you props for that. It can be hard trying to stay true to yourself. At least in high school it is. We went through some pretty crazy phases, especially the weird hipster phase. Good thing that's over with.

You don't have to look and act a certain way to impress people. I wish I could've learned that sooner. You didn't need to have hair feathers in middle school because everybody had them. If you liked them, then sure, but don't try lying to me. I know that you regretted getting them every time you brushed your hair.

Speaking of middle school, honestly, don't even try. No matter how cute your clothes were or who your friends were or how you acted, you'll hate yourself. Everybody ends up hating their middle school self, it's just a given. Puberty, transitioning between elementary to middle school, and the fashion alone ... middle school selves are the worst. Now I'm not saying that I hated myself right after middle school. Of course not. It took years to realize that middle school was the most awkward time of our life and we sort of just want to forget about it.

Past self, all of those things that we wanted to do but thought we were too old or it wasn't cool enough or nobody else wanted to do it with us? We should have just done it. Remember when you thought it'd be cool to be a cheerleader? You should've tried out, it could've been so much fun! And if it wasn't, you always could've quit rather than always wonder if you could've done it. Or at sixth-grade camp, you were so sure that you were afraid of heights that you didn't climb the rock wall, man do I wish you did.

But there are some things that I really appreciate you doing for me. Choosing the IB program, for example, who knows who we'd be without those crazy two years? We definitely wouldn't be who we are now. Or figuring out that you wanted to be a writer and not a vet ... we'd be miserable in vet school.

All and all, past self, I know that there will be times when I hate you (let me just bring up the whole red glasses situation again), but there will never be times when I regret you. Everything you did and didn't do made us into who we are today. And, honestly, in comparison to who we could have been, where we are today is amazing.

I know that at some point future me will hate me and thank me, just like I am doing to you now, but it's just the circle of life. Live and learn.


Current You

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