Disclaimer: I have read the novel "13 Reasons Why" but I have not viewed the Netflix series in its entirety because I am a sad human being who does not have Netflix. Jokes aside, I understand that my view of the series might not be valid at the moment because of this reason. These are my thoughts based on the novel, clips of the show, and other articles I have read. These are not my final thoughts on the series overall since I do plan on watching it to fully understand the show.
I know this is old news but I have to get in on this hype. Ever since "13 Reasons Why" has launched onto our screens, it has not only been attracting impressionable teens and young adults, but it has been initializing the conversation between teens, friends, and parents about suicide. I'm beyond thankful for this conversation because unfortunately to this day we all know that suicide and mental illness is still considered taboo subject matters.
When I first read "13 Reasons Why" a couple years ago, it did not sit well with me. I didn't even understand why I didn't like the novel. I mean, I was a young, insecure high school sophomore and I often felt like I wasn't good enough for my family or friends. I felt isolated and trapped, but not like Hannah Baker. I should've related to Jay Asher's novel (to an extent), but I didn't. I should've empathized with Hannah, but I didn't. I just couldn't bring myself to any reasonable conclusion on why I didn't find myself particularly fond of "13 Reasons Why."
Fast forward to modern day, where I finally realize why I didn't like this novel in the first place.
I'm going to cut right to the point: "13 Reasons Why" showcases that it's acceptable for a victim of suicide to blame others for their suicide. It's acceptable to have others live with the guilt. It's acceptable to have others brainwashed into thinking that they killed a person.
This is the worst case of emotional manipulation being passed off as acceptable.
My problem with the show and the novel is that Hannah is solely portrayed as the victim and the receivers of the tapes are solely viewed as ignorant and at times, heartless perpetrators. I didn't appreciate this portrayal because it's so one-dimensional (there are a couple of exceptions since some of the students do realize their wrongdoings and showcase their remorse and concern for Hannah before her death). Instead of empathizing and feeling for Hannah's hardships, I felt detached from her. Hannah came off as distant, angry, whiny, dramatic, and unrelatable.
Reading and watching clips of "13 Reasons Why" was just weird. It contained the dark subject matters of suicide, rape, and sexual assault, yet most of the plot was dedicated to such campy, whiny, rude, and immature characters. It didn't fit. It is hard to like a book or a show where you find the subject matter relatable, but not the characters.
Also, for a show that centers on teen suicide and bullying, it's kinda strange how mental illness isn't mentioned once. When I want to read about a suicidal teenager, I want to be able to read their thoughts on themselves. Hannah spent nearly all of the novel talking about other people and how awful they are.
What really gets under my skin about this series is that it tries to pass off as a serious, heavy, dark YA Netflix series that introduces suicide awareness. Yet I got a "kids bully girl and girl kills herself, so don't bully" vibe. Suicide is so much more complicated than that and I felt that this show completely watered down this subject. Also, "13 Reasons Why" legitimatizes suicide as an option for
1. Handling challenges you can't deal with and
2. Revenge on people you hate.
Yes, I understand Hannah got more than bullying. She got raped, sexually harassed, betrayed and humiliated on numerous occasions. What I don't understand is that why these situations are set on the same playing field. For instance, why are Jessica and Bryce considered a "reasons" when their crimes are nowhere near each other? Bryce being a reason is understandable but Jessica? "A girl slapped me and stopped being friends with me, that's why she killed me. A boy raped me, that's why he killed me." WHAT?!
I feel like "13 Reasons Why" is that type of series where if you say you don't like it, it makes you seem a heartless person who doesn't care about suicidal people, which couldn't be more untrue considering some of my own friends who are clinically depressed and suffer from suicidal thoughts think of the show as a complete romanticization and glamorization of suicide. Not to mention that they view Hannah as a whiny teenager who starts her own drama, makes bad decisions, and continuously blames others. For instance, obviously, no one deserves to be raped. Bryce is a cruel character. I get that. But if you stumble upon a hot tub full of people you hate, including a misogynistic rapist who groped you publicly in a convenience store, WHY WOULD YOU APPROACH THE HOT TUB AND UNDRESS?!
It was my mistake for looking to this series to find relatable, distressed characters who feel lost and hopeless throughout high school. This series is not for the Hannahs; this is for the Justins, Jessicas, Alexs, Tylers, Courtneys, Marcuses, Zachs, Ryans, Sheris, Clays, Bryces and Mr. Porters.
