In September 2001, my mom made a pivotal decision that changed the course of my life forever—and for the better. That year, my mom married my stepdad and my whole existence has been incredibly and abundantly blessed since.
Divorce is often a sensitive subject for those who have experienced it, as it's notorious for tearing families apart, but it's all I've ever known. My mom and dad have been separated since I was 2 years old, so "normal" for me was weekdays spent with my mom and weekend visitations with my dad. My parents have always had a civil, working relationship since their separation, too, which has boded well for my positive perspective on divorce.
I had never felt that anything or anyone was missing from our lives before my mom married my stepdad, but when she did, we gained an incredible family and a profound love that we never knew we needed. We not only welcomed a stepdad into our family but a stepsister as well. My life has overflowed with joy from that day forward because nothing is better than a third parent to ask when the other two say no and another sister to hang out with.
By now, you're probably thinking, "Yeah, yeah, your stepdad's great, your stepsister's awesome, blah, blah, blah"—but for me, divorce is so much more than that. First of all, do you know how amazing it is to have not one, but two dads? There's always someone around to fix something (when my mom can't, of course, because she's a strong, independent woman after all). Whether my car needs repairs or one of my many DIY projects requires power tools that I clearly don't know how to operate, I've got a dad for that. Whenever I want to see the latest Marvel movie or I need help with a math problem, I've got a dad for that. I've been endowed with two wonderful men in my life with vastly different personalities that complement all parts of who I am, and that is one gift that I will never take for granted.
Secondly, I have another sister to add to the three I have. That gives me one more immensely kind and sweet individual in my life to support me unconditionally in everything that I do. I have another person that I can trust to talk and vent to and to share stories and secrets with. I have an additional someone to go shopping and to go on vacation with. I also have another sibling to look up to as a role model for an outstanding wife and mother, and she even gave me two of the best nephews to play Heads Up, to shoot Nerf guns and to talk shop with. (Pokémon... We talk about Pokémon—battle strategies, type advantages, strengths and weaknesses—you get the picture.) The reality of the matter is that sisters are like clothes—you can never have too many, and I am so, so happy that I gained another one 15 years ago.
Unfortunately, divorce isn't as great for everyone as it has been for me. It can be a time of hardship and struggle, and it doesn't always end in a bigger, better family, as in my case. But I choose to look past the negativity that's so often associated with separation. My parents' divorce was a win, not a loss because I can say with complete and total confidence that every member of my family is happy with our dynamic as it stands today. It works for us because everyone has put forth effort into making it so and that dedication and integrity combined with the overabundance of love we've amassed is exactly why divorce is the best thing that's ever happened to me.
