A disclaimer: I still have a bit of trouble deciding how I feel/should feel about this and would gladly welcome any sort of insight.

On the night of Tuesday, May 3, the editor of the Peel shared a letter she found in her mailbox. The letter, written by an unnamed Pitzer first-year, recounts her experience of being drugged and then sexually assaulted by two male students from Claremont McKenna College. The story is painful to read as it involves something that many don’t consider possible at an institution as progressive (comparatively) and as understanding of social justice (supposedly) as Pitzer, or perhaps even the Claremont Colleges in general. The way she interjects the retelling of the incident with insights into her own life further incites our shock and pity. It is no wonder that come Wednesday morning the story was all over Facebook. Students from all of the 5Cs shared the link to the letter, and my newsfeed was populated with long posts that often included incisive critiques of the CMC students’ behaviour and/or sympathetic offers of help from those who simply abhorred the incident as well as those who were past victims of sexual assault. I had never seen our community be so united and frankly I was impressed.

But that sentiment was short-lived. The more I saw, the more uncomfortable I became with how and from whom the story was shared. While I agreed with much of what was said, I found myself questioning how genuine a lot of these posts were. I was, and still am, conflicted because I wanted this incident to be made known as so many cases of sexual assault are silenced and dismissed, but I also questioned the effectiveness of a mere Facebook post. While I salute those who have announced their solidarity with the student (whether that is on social media or in real life), I am still struggling to figure out what sharing yet another post calling for Justice (with the intentional capital J) and criticising the CMC students (who the Pitzer student chose not to name) is really going to do. As real as the sympathy can be for this student, so many of these posts felt like one-off attempts to “help.” It was almost as if sharing the post was some sort of community service credit everyone felt the need to complete. On one hand, people showing support is good (right?), on the other hand, so many of these posts oozed with preachy, self-righteousness masked by mentions of the girl and the Injustice of it all and the sharing of personal cell numbers. It was these posts that frustrated me because they, one, don’t seem truly genuine, and, two, are unneeded insertions into a conversation in which many of us don’t really have a place.

Pitzer is so small. The girl who wrote the letter literally lived in my dorm. I’ve probably walked past her so many times and honestly, quite possibly, so have you. You would’ve given her a smile or a nod at best, but chances are, like me, you pretended to suddenly take interest in your phone or your nails or the sky—anything to have avoided eye contact with some stranger. That so many people only took interest in this student after her incident bothers me. Was she not worth befriending before? The personal issues she mentions going through were going on way before the incident happened. Where were you then?

Then there’s the fact that so many people who have posted about this don’t realise that by doing so they are forcing their way into a dialogue of which they have no part unless they actively do something to help. Sharing a link is not enough! I want to go so far as to say that those who have simply written a post are actually detracting from the words and work of those who are genuinely committed to this issue. So many of these posts—whether they are one-off posts or posts by people who have personally taken advantage of women (I know, the hypocrisy is so painful)—are so empty and end up doing more harm than good because they direct, for even just a moment, the focus away from the victims and the issue at hand to themselves.

I do realise that by writing about those who take attention away from the Pitzer student and rape culture in general, I am guilty of my own condemnation. I guess my hopes are just that we fix the way we talk about issues like this so we can better unite and rally against those who perpetrate such heinous crimes in the future. There is no denying that the 5Cs are made up of incredibly intelligent and understanding people and I want to hope that we’ll find a better way of doing this. But it is already the summer and time has dampened the impact of the incident. Since the publication of the letter, two Republican nominees have dropped out from the race, seniors everywhere have graduated, Gucci Mane has been released from prison, and we are all home—far, far away from the happenings of a college campus. There’s not much time or reason to worry about the student anymore. Good thing we shared the link right after it was posted, right?