STUCK. You know the feeling. Spinning your wheels, losing motivation, constantly feeling like you have wasted precious time. With even the best intentions, we all can experience a reoccurrence of procrastination and productivity paralysis.

"Why, do I do this to myself," I often wonder, as I became frustrated with my evident patterns of post-posing what I say I am passionate about pursuing. Have you been there? Are you in this vicious cycle of self-criticism? I am right there with you.

Dreams, goals, aspiration, are both life-giving and anxiety-producing. At least for me.

Recently, I begin the process of peeling back layers of my self-provoked pressure to find clarity for why I continued to feel challenged by my own creativity. What is it that weighs me down? Why do I daily face defeat and frequently feel captive to the up and down rollercoaster of irrationality?

Here is what I have come to realize:

I am guilty of trying to short-hand the script of my story. I want to simply review the spark notes of struggle and study, skipping the pages of planning and preparing to arrive at the destination of my dreams. Unfortunately, it is this type of mindset that keeps us from having the courage to cultivating our callings. We need the seasons of struggle and study to weed out the bad ideas and grow the new ones. Similarly, the hour of planning and preparation shape our success and help us to sustain what we have started.

One author explains this process saying, "potential is the space between where you and where you want to be." It is within developing our potential we often get stuck, isn't it? So, in seeking to reframe my discouragement I have started to take a few steps that have been helping me get unstuck and start working towards the direction of my dreams. I hope these simple strategies can help you too!

1. Develop a Daily Direction

Do I focus on my destination over my daily direction?

I believe this mindset is the number 1 thing that trips us up. Sadly, it is one thing that has truly crippled me in my calling for many reasons. First, it placed a tremendous amount of pressure on my ability to produce. When I did not meet my destination demands, the feelings of failure would immediately flood my workflow. There I would stay, stuck in self-doubt.

Here is what I am learning, when I am more focused on my destination rather than a daily direction, I became quickly discouraged. In Proverbs 16, David reminds us of who is in control of our destination saying,

"The heart of man plans his way,

but the Lord establishes his steps."

When we are set on an ideal destination, we will not be as open to God's divine direction.

How often we plan in the pretense of God's promise, not willing to prepare for a different purpose. The bottom line is this, we must focus on our daily direction to arrive at our final destination. What does that look like? Here's my tool for finding my daily direction:

In my counseling practice, I have been trained to use the SMART goal model. It has the following elements: Specific, measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and time-bound.

Putting this model into action we must have a destination in mind.

Let's say for example I want to run a half marathon this fall, that's my goal and intended destination. So, using the SMART model, I would then map out my "Daily Direction" using the above elements.

-Goal 1: Register for the race by 10/1/19.

-Goal 2: Create a running schedule by 10/1/19

-Goal 3: Run at least 3x weekly until 11/10/19.

In following the SMART formula, I can realistically plan and organize my training goals, while focusing my attention on the daily direction of my running rather than the discouragement of not having reached the full course mileage.

By taking daily steps in specific and realistic ways, we can regain our workflow and feel more productive,

2. Speak Truth to Yourself

Am I listening to myself or talking to myself?

Oh, boy. If stuck had a sister it would be negative self-talk. I think this is one of the most discussed topics in my work because, let's face it, we all are stuck with ourselves. Just think back to the last time you listened to a negative statement you said to yourself. I believe mine was, "What am I even doing with my life". So encouraging, right?

The messages we feed ourselves are deeply placed perspectives that have either past or presently influenced our progress. As we know, words hurt, and we often wound ourselves without even knowing it. Our thoughts and feelings begin to fluctuate when we befriend negative core beliefs.

One common way to ward off unwanted feelings or phrases is through evaluating their roots and rationalizing their reasoning.

When we repeat statements such as, "I can't" or "I am not good enough to (fill in the blank)", we give power to our perceived limitations rather than seeking to empower our potential. This is the equivalent of black and white thinking, which limits the space between what is perceived and what can someday be achieved. By simply reframing our thoughts, we began to grant ourselves the gift of grace.

I believe that God's grace is a beautiful example for us to go-getters, who often measure our worth by our work. The grace of God invites us to acknowledge our limitations and humbly ask for the wisdom and way to develop our dreams through dependence on His power and purpose.

So, when I am overwhelmed and begin to blame myself for not being "good enough" to "get it all down" I speak truth to myself. I go back to the grace I have been given and fight against the feelings that tell me to forget my dreams and give up on my gifts. I am reminded of Paul's words to the church in Ephesus, "And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up (Ephesians6:9).

3. See the Worth in Your Work

Do I work for my worth or see the worth in my work?

Ever completed a project, achieved a goal, only to feel a sense of dissatisfaction? Same here. I remember completing my Master's degree, walking across the stage, smiling for photos yet feeling an ambivalence towards the accomplishment. I was glad to be done, but instead of feeling as though I had gained something, I felt more like I had lost something.

Here is where our "stuck" can really get sticky.

When we begin to work for our worth, we will lose sight of our why. Think about the reason you started your business or blog. What inspired you to go to college or seek new skills?

There is a large portion of our population that have lost their purpose in the pursuit of performance.

Here is the cold hard truth, there will always be something "Better". There will always be a better book, a better boss, better blog post or better business. Thus, is seeking to find our personal worth in our work, we begin to use an unrealistic measurement of our value which will only leave us discontent and discouraged.

Friend, your worth is what makes you human. And nothing in this world can be added to the value you already possess, just breathing and being.

So, explore the worth in your WHY, look deep into the desires that set your heart on fire, and see the worth and value of what makes you move! That's a worth, worth fighting for!

I am reminded day after day, that my ultimate why is the Gospel. Paul reminds us that in whatever we do, we are to do it to the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31).

Let's use the gifts God has given us, to be his hands and feet!

4. Plan For Today (Not 10 years from now)

Do I use a timeline or time-block in developing my dreams?

Timelines, I love them. Forecasting at its finest right? But what if our timelines are what trip us up?

Paul Angone, author of 101 Secrets for your Twenties, explains it best saying, "our big dreams are not the problem our crazy timelines are."

Creating an unrealistic timeline can rush the process and the pressure that proceeds often provokes our procrastination. When I fail to meet my timeline deadlines, I feel frustrated with my present placement. This discouragement is what creates even more delays. Okay, so maybe the timeline of our lives is nothing like we had planned, it does not mean our dreams are dead.

Ever lose interest in a project or passion? It was most likely due to self-imposed stress. Ecclesiastes 3:12-13 gives us an important view of work when the writer says,

"that there is nothing better for men than to rejoice and do good while they live, and also that every man should eat and drink and find satisfaction in all his labor—this is the gift of God."

Do we find satisfaction in our work? Or are we avoiding the stress of incomplete tasks?

One way I have learned to reclaim the satisfaction of my work is by using a time-block system within my timeline.

This isn't new stuff, and if you are doing this already, wonderful, I am finally catching up. But for those of you new to workflow wonders, here is a little lesson in time-blocking.

Instead of constantly looking at the forecasting of an entire timeline, time-blocking stays in the present. It focuses on what is foremost and frames our free time so that we can focus on one task at a time. As someone who thrives on structure, I find that my productivity rises when I have time-frames for each task or objective of the day. Ultimately, this tool decreases stress and also assists in setting aside time for both study and self-care.

I hope these few strategies will also help you get unstuck as you continue to press on and pursue your calling.

Let's keep dreaming together.

-CM