First off, I must say that I never expected to decide to bring my story out in such a public way. Experiencing hate is an unforgettable experience that touches you and leaves you feeling broken. Painful, personal memories don't fade quickly, and it is still fresh in my heart.

Here's my story:

I am Jewish, and from an area with an extremely Jewish community. I grew up surrounded by people like me. All my life, we celebrated the same holidays, shared the same customs, and understood each other. Of course, we had friends who weren't Jewish, but never did we feel a divide between us. Our friends who weren’t Jewish spent their early teenage years attending bar and bat mitzvahs just like us. Our high school spent extra time teaching us about the Holocaust, and our library even had its own Torah. Being Jewish was so normal to me, and while living in this happy, Jewish bubble, I wasn't aware that my people are a minority–and we are still misunderstood and disliked.

I spent two years at a college upstate (of which I've since transferred from), where, in passing, I would overhear ignorant Jewish jokes. People would say little remarks when they learned that I was Jewish. I would lightly defend myself, and tell my peers that what they were saying wasn't okay. I recognized that some of these people didn't understand Judaism, and I assumed it was because they weren’t ever exposed to it. Looking back, I see that this environment was not accepting, and not as open as I would have hoped. This wasn't a healthy environment, and just wanting a happy college experience, I tried to look at the bright side and see past people's ignorance.

My second year of college was when it started to really affect me. I would be asked ridiculous questions about my religion often. Questions that really hit home included, “Carly, why do you celebrate fake holidays?” and, "Are you cheap like the other Jews?" During Passover I had to bring my own matzo to the dining hall, and I would eat it quickly. It’s not that I was embarrassed of being Jewish, I simply did not want to hear any comments. At one point, I decided to cut myself off from anyone who gave me a hard time for being Jewish.

Just when I had enough, I was called the worst word that a Jewish person could be called. I came home one night to find that my whiteboard had my name erased, with that word in its place. That night and the image of the writing are ingrained into my memory. I remember feeling my stomach sink as soon as I saw it. I called my boyfriend and my parents, and eventually the RA on duty.

Honestly, I never believed that one word written with a marker would affect me as much as this did. It was so shocking that someone could really go that far to call me such an ugly word.

I always ask myself why I was so disliked by these people. It wasn't because of my personality or my actions–it was because of my religion. At that moment, I remember wishing that they hated me because of something that I did, something explainable that I could reflect on, never repeat, and move on. But this was different, and it hurt to see that this hate existed in people's hearts.

It was the week before finals. I wasn't ready to get out of bed for a few days. I felt alone, as my family and my little Jewish town felt so far away. I had to pull myself together and make it through finals week.

I do believe that the college wasn't fully aware of the anti-Semitism that was living on campus. I spoke to my Jewish friends there, and each of them had felt like I had at least once. I brought what had happened to the attention of the school, and I gave them some feedback on how they could maybe make the school a more welcoming place. I can only hope for the future Jewish students to attend that school that they make an active change.

This was definitely a learning experience for me. The officials referred to me as the "victim," and it felt weird because I had never before been a victim. In my head I denied that I was, but I guess in a sense I am a victim. I wish for no one to experience hate because they are misunderstood or prejudged by others just because they follow a different religion, or come from a different background.

The next step in my story is to find acceptance. I decided to drop the charges I had filed with the school because I realized that the person who had done this (I know who it was, in case you were wondering) has hate in his/her heart, and a punishment from the college isn't going to change that. I have to hope that good things happen to good people, and karma comes around for others. I have to put my trust in the universe that awful people with that much hate in their hearts will lose out in the long run. This person is in the universe's hands now, and I have to look forward to the fact that I am now free of this hostile environment that I felt trapped in. Never again will I have to see the people who treated me like that.

It’s been almost six months since, and the only thing I can do is move on. I am so grateful that I had amazing friends and family to get me through this, and that I am at a new school where I’m not afraid of being who I am. I haven’t told many people about what had happened, but I’ve been walking around with this weight on my shoulders and I thought it was time. My advice to those who are experiencing this is to get help as soon as possible. I wish I went to someone sooner with my worries.

Being Jewish is a part of who I am. We Jews are a strong people, and after experiencing thousands of years of hate, we are still strong and we are still proud. I will always love my religion, and although hate hurts, I will always be proud of who I am.