When I was a freshman in College, I decided to try being a vegan. The reasons for this decision were quite varied. Being an animal lover, I've always found it hard to admit that some of my food came from the slaughtering of an animal. I had also taken the time to learn about animal agriculture and found that beef, pork and poultry industries tend to be really depressing and unethical. I saw footage of cows that had been pumped full of hormones, standing in their own filth, waiting to be killed for their meat. It made me sad. Just because another creature isn't as cognitively adept as humans, doesn't mean it deserves to be treated so poorly. Also, the amount of carbon dioxide emissions that arise from transporting so much meat, as well as emissions that arise from farming the land used for growing the corn that the cows consume, are massive. That entire industry leaves behind one enormous carbon foot print. Lastly, Americans consume large amounts of meat and dairy, not enough fruits and vegetables. And our health is declining.

So, upon hearing that it is possible to be healthy without animal products, I decided to give it a shot. To begin, I threw away anything I owned that was tested on animals. This included make-up, hairspray, lotion and all of my Burt's Bees products (the bees work hard for their honey). Then, it was time to develop a taste of foods that I wasn't used to: soy milk, tofu, veggie burgers. And say goodbye to others: yogurt, ice-cream, lattes with skim milk. I then took inventory of my clothing. I had a few items made of leather that I liked a lot but I decided to be rid of them. No more Minnetonka moccasins, even though I was stupidly attached them at the time. I was feeling pretty good about everything until my mother mentioned all the tack I have for horseback riding in my closet. Horses are a big part of my life; I love showing and helping others learn to show. Almost all my stuff (saddles, bridles) was made of leather. I genuinely wanted to replace all of those items with non-leather equipment, however, that stuff was expensive, tough to replace and it was even more difficult to fine non-leather items of decent quality. So, I figured I'd just be a dietary vegan. No big deal, right? Easy to explain, I thought, as I picked my shoes and belts out of the trash.

The first couple weeks were tough because I needed to find ways of eating a vegan diet and still remaining within the food choices that my college at the time would support through their meal plan. They had lots of fresh spinach in cafeteria. That's good, I thought. They offered veggie burgers and oatmeal. Coffee and tea is always available. Their other produce often looked wilted and unappetizing. The carrots were dry and the apples weren't sweet or flavorful. Often times, I found myself skipping meals because I couldn't find something in the cafeteria that was healthy and vegan. Later on, I found myself eating onion rings and cherry slushies from the fast food places my friends would insist on going to, rather than my usual salad (that normally had meat, bacon bits and came with a choice of any dairy infused dressing) or soup (chicken broth). That deadly combination of saturated fat and lots of sugar left me feeling gross yet oddly wanting to come back the next day and have some more. It was tough. The whole experience was tough. I didn't feel better or look better, like I thought I would. I found that the stress of figuring out what to eat, especially in a campus setting as a broke college student, was much greater than I anticipated. However, defending my exploration into veganism to my friends and family was even tougher.

I was constantly being asked why. As someone who doesn't like telling people how to live their lives, it was hard for me when people would get defensive just because I'm doing something different than what they do. They would assume that I was automatically judging them (and I wasn't) My responses regarding why I was a vegan were always pretty straightforward: animal agriculture makes me uncomfortable and I don't want to support it, I feel bad for the animals, I want to see how I feel without animal products in my life, I don't want to feel guilty anymore, it's better for the environment. At the end of every explanation would be a statement kind of like, "and I don't care what other people decide to do, this is what I'm doing." It was simple enough but too often the responses that followed would be statements like, "I could never do that. It seems ridiculous to not eat meat when eating meat is totally normal. Humans are supposed to eat cows and chickens." And then my favorite, "Where to you get your protein?"

It was tough. What I was doing had nothing to do with anyone but me. It is indeed natural for humans to consume other organisms. It's debatable about how natural it is to trap large amounts of other organisms in a facility, pump them full of antibiotics and hormones, slaughter them in masses, package them and freeze them and transport the product all across the country. But you know what? That's the world we live in. All I wanted to do was to avoid taking part in something I wasn't so keen on.

Today, I'm no longer a vegan. After a year of commitment, I found avoiding dairy to be too stressful and challenging. Dairy has its way to sneaking into many different food products and I was tired of worrying about it. It was often the one thing that stood between me and a quick, decent meal. Right now, I'm a vegetarian that doesn't eat a lot of dairy. Through this experience, I've learned how to eat much healthier. I've developed a taste for almond milk, salads with romaine lettuce, red onions, parmesian and olive oil, and butternut squash soup, all of which are fantastic. I've learned how to cook and I make a lot of my own meals now. I feel better, emotionally and physically, just like I thought I would.