‘Tis the season of moving out for thousands of college kids all over the U.S. and, as a fellow college kid, let me tell you that moving out of your parents’ house is not easy. We have to be prepared. We have to think about what to pack, what to buy, how much everything is, the logistics of moving all of our stuff to a small room. The list goes on and on, but the hardest part of leaving is the “missing” part.
There are a lot of things that we’ll all miss when we leave, like having a stocked fridge, having most of our living expenses covered, and, if you’re lucky enough, having someplace where you belong.
But interestingly enough, a lot of the things that we’ll miss are things we can do something about when we get to our new home. We can get a job to keep food in the fridge and cover expenses, and we can find try to find a new place where we can belong.
One thing that we can’t really do something about is leaving the people we care about. There are ways that we can cope with it, such as video and phone calls, but it’s never going to be the same as being with them. Even if we talk with them every day, the dynamics of the relationship will change and that’s something we’re going to have to cope with.
For me, one of the people I’ll be leaving behind is my little sister. I’ve had the privilege to grow up with an energetic, outgoing girl that has never failed to make me laugh and feel at home. She knows all of my jokes and understands my dry humor. We can even have conversations through looks and glances alone. We grew up as each other’s support and having this kind of person beside me my entire life makes it really hard to let go. I’m not only going to miss the comfort of our friendship, but I’m also afraid of losing a place in her world.
When I move out, we’ll start on our own paths and it’ll break my heart to know that one day, because of this separation, we’ll lose a place in each other’s world.
It’s sad and it’s scary to have to leave someone you care about, but it doesn’t have to be the end and it definitely doesn’t have to be goodbye. Even though distance may separate me and my sister, we still had that time where we were each other’s world and that has to be enough. Realistically, we have to accept that our worlds will change from here on out but we don’t have to lose our place in each other’s world.
Sure, my role in her life might change now that we’re further away from each other, but the love and friendship is still there and the thing about great love and great friendship is that the bond created in that kind of relationship can span not only the distance, but a lifetime.
So, to all of you leaving someone behind: don’t be afraid to say goodbye because it isn’t goodbye. Our paths may make us go in different directions, but that doesn’t mean that they won’t intersect once more and that doesn’t mean that there’s no way to talk to each other.
Only half the battle in maintaining a relationship is finding a location where the paths cross. The other half is picking up a phone and asking that person, whoever that may be, to meet you at the crossroads.
If you do your best, then it’s not goodbye. It’s only until next time.
