Cheating on someone is one of the lowest forms of complete disregard for other human beings. That statement may seem a bit over-dramatic but being cheated on can have drastic effects on someone's mental, emotional, and even physical state. It's safe to say that almost everyone either has been cheated on or is close to someone who has been cheated on and thus knows the effects that follow, so why do we keep romanticizing cheaters and cheating?
Let's look at movies, shall we?... "Love Actually," "The Loft," "John Tucker Must Die," "Brokeback Mountain," "The Girl On the Train," the list could go on and on.
Now on to television shows… "Sex and The City," "Scandal," "The Affair," "Mad Men," "Gossip Girl," "Game of Thrones," "Friends." Again, the list could go on for days. Oh, and let's not forget just about every reality TV show out there that has even one couple in the cast, because there's bound to be some cheating going on there.
Ok, so some of these don't entirely romanticize adultery, but let's be honest, we are pulled into the drama and the sleuthing and the eventual pinnacle of the affair within the plot, and that alone romanticizes cheating in our world. However, there are way too many movies and shows out there that paint the cheater as a good person, or one that made instant repentance and still "gets the girl (or guy)" in the end.
In "John Tucker Must Die," sure, JT was tormented by the girls he cheated on, but he still got the girl in the end and even became friends with the girls he cheated on! In "Friends," Kathy cheated on Joey with Chandler, but Kathy and Chandler wound up together (albeit not permanently). And don't even get me started on the whole Ross and Rachel situation. Ross hardly deserved a second chance, and he definitely shouldn't have been given a second chance that would alter Rachel's career path.
"Love, Actually" is probably the worst offender out there for romanticizing cheating. A man is in love with his best friend's wife and he thinks it's ok to profess his love to her? And she thinks its ok to return the favor by kissing him on the stoop of her home, which she shares with her husband? And, to top it all off, we all find it incredibly romantic somehow??
Why and how do these plots with unfaithful and repulsive people draw us in and keep our attention? As with many cruel and vile acts, we as a collective people have been desensitized to realities of our world through the so-called entertainment funneled into our homes. From simple adultery being viewed as exciting and even somehow wrapping up in a grand, romantic gesture to a gruesome murder being displayed in any given detective show or horror film, the desensitization of our populations is startling and unsettling.
But how do we move beyond the desensitization that has been instilled in so many for so long? By exposing the truth. Gone should be the days of the cheater finding a happy ending with the person whose heart was broken by none other than that cheater themselves. Wake up, people! Cheating and adultery are not exciting, or sexy, or invigorating, at least not for the vast majority. And almost anyone who has been cheated on can attest to the fact that being cheated on certainly is neither invigorating nor exciting, but upsetting, hurtful, and damaging.
There are four branches of cheating that can affect a person, those being… 1. Being cheated on. 2. Knowing someone who has cheated. 3. Knowing someone who has been cheated on. 4. Cheating on someone.
Having been affected by the first three of those four in the past, I can say with a great deal of certainty that very rarely does anyone come away from an unfaithful relationship, whatever their role in said relationship, unscathed. With that said, let's shed a light on the inhumanity and disrespect that is cheating so we can lessen the heartbreak among us.
No good can come from disrespecting a person and their trust so deeply and so hurtfully, and the happily ever after that is all too often depicted in movies and TV shows is rare. However, the number of hurt and exhausted romantics will only grow if cheating and adultery continue to be romanticized throughout the media. Through an end to the desensitization of cheating and adultery, to the heartbreak and anguish that follow, a happier, kinder, and more loving generation and population can flourish and set a good and wholesome example for future generations.
