In high school, I was always the “smart” one. We had a running joke between my two best friends and I: I was the smart one, Sara was the awkward one, and Katlyn was the ditzy one. And 50 percent of the time, those words made sense for us. But even though “smart” usually has a positive connotation, it sometimes felt like an insult. The smart one? That’s all I was? And what happened when I did something that didn’t fit my label?

I felt bad about thinking being smart wasn’t enough, but since high school, I’ve realized that it’s a valid concern -- my entire person cannot be contained in a single word. It can’t even be contained in five thousand words. Lately, I’ve learned that there is an intrinsic quality, something about the way someone lives his life, or holds himself, that makes that person unique. Something that can’t be put into words, and that no one can see about herself.

That’s why, I think, we have such a hard time seeing the good in ourselves. There are words that describe us, yes, but we’ll never see what an outsider sees. We’ll never know the feeling someone who loves us gets when they see us. We’ll never know how we look when we sleep, or how our eyes light up when we talk about our favorite things. And that is what makes someone beautiful and authentic.

Sure, there’s outward beauty, you know, the “pretty friend”. And that’s awesome, that’s great, but the pretty friend is so much more than just the pretty friend. She has passions and dreams and goals. There are things she hates and things she loves, and things that gross her out.

The point is to not judge someone prematurely. I know we all look at other people and make snap judgments based solely on what we see or what we’ve heard. But that isn’t real. The “smart friend” has dumb moments. The “ditzy friend” is actually really quick on her toes, it just doesn’t always show. And the “awkward friend” is one of the friendliest, sweetest people you’ll ever meet. We are more than the words that define us -- there is something about each person that literally cannot be put into words. Find those indescribable qualities about someone, and you really know them.