You Deserve To Be Met Halfway And Nothing Less

I didn't expect to find myself in a relationship in college. My mentality coming into college was that I couldn't make time for someone else. My focus was academics and growing myself through academics, but I've come to see that that's not the only way to grow.

While it didn't last long, I came out knowing what I want in a partner and how I am capable of handling the less-than-ideal situations. It is alright for both parties to be different, but there has to be equal efforts put in by both sides to reach some sort of common ground. I felt that the effort I was putting in wasn't always reciprocated, and initially, I believed that to be "normal" and I told myself to try harder. Over time, I felt that the relationship was becoming more and more one-sided. I initiated the conversations and the text messages, and I grew tired of it.

Eventually, it came to an end, but I'm not mad, and I'm not going to allow myself to dwell over it. Of course, I was upset, but I learned that it's okay to be selfish sometimes. You deserve to receive what you put in, and I didn't see that in my relationship. I wanted us to meet halfway, but it didn't turn out that way. There was also a lack of communication and perhaps, I wasn't clear about what I wanted. I came out learning that I needed to better communicate my feelings and what I expect out of a relationship. At the end of it, I saw myself forgiving and understanding the other point of view, which is why I didn't walk out of this angry.

I was happy to have been in a relationship though. There were some really good times, and I was truly happy. In all honesty, I have no hate or regret. If anything, I needed to know what I want in a relationship, and now I do. I felt incredible emotional growth, and it's the best feeling ever.