As a 19-year-old woman, all you can hope for in the dating world is to learn from your experiences. At the end of the day though, all we girls really think about is dessert. Here is a list of the men I've dated, if they were, in fact, desserts.
The High School One: A Sugar Cookie
Pretty good for a long time, but nothing too exciting. Ultimately ended up being poisonous to me after I became gluten-intolerant. Who knew that this was the reason for my eternal stomach aches? Missed having sugar cookies for a while, but became much happier after not too long when a few of the primary ingredients were replaced.
The One Who Stole My Sock On Halloweekend: Candy Corn
Here's the thing about candy corn—no matter how many times you decide it's terrible, you still give it a chance when it's sitting out at a party. Regardless, candy corn will always leave you feeling disgusted with yourself and him. If you have candy corn, you should probably just throw it away; it's not nice. With its processed nature and unhealthy chemicals, candy corn never had your best interests in mind, anyway.
The Musician/Athlete/Businessman One: Cheesecake
Very good looking. Well rounded and sometimes a little wild. Has a lot of charm. Cheesecake would be okay if you can find one closer to your age.
The Hipster One: A Zucchini Brownie
A mature and unique dessert. Not out to corrupt you in any way. Had friend approval. Probably could've been a fairly healthy choice, but I just didn't feel that passionately about Zucchini.
The British One: English Toffee Pudding
Potentially a very fun and promising choice. I certainly wouldn't have minded showing off English toffee pudding. Nice to look at, even nicer to listen to. A little too slow-moving unfortunately.
The Intellectual One: A Lemon Tart
Also an incredibly good looking dessert. Mom approved. Not too sweet and not too sour; good at bantering. Perhaps a bit methodical, but is both fun and responsible. Sort of seems like a new and improved version of the sugar cookie at first, just with a much sharper taste (in clothes, cars, and colleges). Good friends cheer you on when you have a lemon tart. Not boring, but not dangerous.
